Hurry Home
by corlando
Summary: An undercover case plunges Kate into the violent world of a Russian drug ring. How will it affect her blossoming relationship with Castle?
1. Chapter 1

**An undercover case plunges Kate into the violent world of a Russian drug ring. How will it affect her blossoming relationship with Castle?**

_Rated T for language, violence, and sexual situations._

_I own nothing and won't make a dime off of this but it was certainly fun to write. Thank you to Andrew Marlowe and company for making these characters come alive in my head._

_*Special thanks to my incredible beta team of NathanFan, Whatarushh, and Lady Brenlis. Without you this story probably wouldn't exist and it certainly wouldn't be as good. Thank you!_

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_Chapter 1-_

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The first thing she remembers is the feel of him on top of her in the van. The sharp pain as his knees dug into her thighs, pinning her down. How her arms felt like lead when she took a swing at him. The strange sound her head made as it fell back hitting the metal floor. Then it all went black.

There was the vague sense of falling. Stairs? She can't quite recall, her mind still fuzzy. But now she's aware of a shooting pain in her legs and a loud voice piercing through her headache.

"Katya baby. Enough nap time. Prosnut'sya."

Consciousness slowly filters back as she realizes the voice is speaking a mix of English and Russian. The case! She's working the case. Her eyes pop open at the thought and her world spins . Where the hell is she? Why was she so damn dizzy and why can't she pull her hands down from above her head?

"There's a good girl. Papa's missed you." The tone completely belied the friendliness of the words.

.

_***Two days earlier***_

Where was that oregano? Rick Castle was searching through his kitchen trying to locate the errant spice. He hated when his mother cooked. Actually he usually appreciated the effort but he could never find anything afterwards. Why she was still cooking in his kitchen after moving in with Chet was a mystery he wasn't going to try and solve. Especially when what he really needed was oregano.

"Aha!" he said aloud to no one. The spice, sitting next to a bottle of sherry instead of its assigned place on the spice rack. He was making his famous chicken cacciatore for Kate tonight. With a heavy caseload, Alexis diligently studying for midterms, and mother's frequent visits, the evenings spent at his place had been few and were usually family events. Although he liked it when she spent time with his family, Castle found himself really looking forward to some alone time with his favorite detective in the comfort of his own home.

Answering his phone, "So are you on your way?" He saw it was her before answering and couldn't keep the giddy anticipation out of his voice. What he heard on the other end was anything but giddy.

"No and I'm sorry."

At least she managed to sound almost as disappointed as he felt hearing her words. "A case?" He sighed. His voice sounded a bit pathetic even to him but he wanted her here.

"Sort of. Its actually an old case and I'm afraid its coming back to haunt me in ways I never expected."

.

_***2 hours before dinner***_

Kate Beckett sat at her desk finishing up her paperwork as quickly as she could. Rick was making dinner tonight, at his place. With non-stop cases, they hadn't had a lot of time to spend together recently and she was looking forward to the casual time alone as much as he was. Of course she was a little more reserved about showing it. Then again there were times that a ten year old could be more reserved than Rick Castle but she had to admit there were days when she found it charming. Castle always seemed to wear his heart on his sleeve. She was only just starting to realize that she might be holding a piece of it.

Shaken from her daydream, an officer she didn't recognize headed into Capt. Montgomery's office. Not that unusual. Just enough to get her focused on finishing her paperwork, until she noticed both men glancing at her through the window. Now what was that about? Esposito wandered over and sat on the edge of her desk. He watched the office as he spoke to Beckett.

"What do you think that's all about?" he echoed her thoughts.

"I don't know." Beckett responded, her curiosity was equally piqued.

"They've looked at you three times already and Montgomery doesn't look happy. What did you do?" Half teasing her.

"Got me but it looks like I'm about to find out."

Esposito looked over to see Montgomery opening his door and calling for Beckett to come in.

"Sir?"

"Shut the door," was the only response. His brow furrowed in a way that made Kate wary. "This is Lt. Casey. "

Kate and the Lieutenant shook hands. "What can we do for you today Lieutenant?" She straightened her shoulders trying to quell any signs of anxiousness. Silently wondering why he was here and what this had to do with her.

"Casey came in to talk to me about a previous case you worked on Beckett. And how they may need your help to close it, again."


	2. Chapter 2

It was getting late. Kate sat on a musty smelling sofa in a NYPD safe house with goop in her hair reading case files both past and present. She sighed. She should be having a home cooked meal, curled up in Rick's arms on his obscenely comfortable leather couch. Some days life just didn't play fair.

She looked at the timer. Ten more minutes and she could wash this stuff out of her hair. Blonde. She didn't like being blonde. She'd done it once before for this very case and had been thrilled when her natural color grew back. Now she wondered how Rick would feel when she came back as a blonde. The corners of her mouth turned upwards as she imagined his reaction to her Russian accent and blonde locks. A little role play might be fun. Maybe blonde wouldn't be so bad, at least temporarily.

Lt. Casey thought going back to blonde made sense.

"You were blonde when you went undercover the first time. We want you to feel as familiar to them as possible. They trusted Katya. Your cover was still intact when it was over. If we play our cards right there's no reason why they shouldn't trust you now."

No reason? She tried to suppress the eye roll. No reason other than these were hardened criminals moving enough crystal meth to get half the city high. Trust wouldn't be their first reaction.

Montgomery still wasn't convinced. He wasn't sure how he felt about handing his best detective over to a team he didn't know. "What about the press she's gotten because of the book? What if she gets recognized?"

Kate had the same thoughts but already set them aside. "The last photos were for that Cosmo article. There was only one of me and that was over a year ago. I think Lt. Casey's right, Sir. If I go in as a blonde, speaking Russian, they'll remember me as Katya. They knew her before Nikki Heat ever existed. If anyone notices a resemblance I should be able to play it off."

"So you're OK with this?" Eyebrows raised, the Captain looked a bit surprised.

"If it weren't for a technicality Zukov would still be behind bars where he belongs. I'd like the opportunity to finish the job. Besides, if everything is set up the way Lt. Casey says, then it shouldn't take very long."

Things moved quickly after that. She barely had time to call Rick and explain.

"Give me twenty minutes and I'll be there." A Russian drug ring. Kate as Katya. He didn't' want to miss this.

"Castle, no. They're moving me to the safe house now to get me prepped. The less people involved, the less attention it will draw." As much as she wanted to see him, as much as his presence might ease her nerves, she knew it was smarter to keep him out of this.

"But I can help you prep. Go over the case files. Make sure you don't miss anything." He knew he was grasping at straws but he didn't like feeling left out.

"I can read a case file all on my own Castle." She took a deep breath. She didn't mean to sound annoyed with him. He was only trying to help. Her voice softer, "Any chance I can get a rain check on dinner? If the intel they have is right we should close this thing in two days. You can help me celebrate?"

"Fine." He was pouting. "Just hurry home Detective. I'll have big plans for dessert."

...

...

Undercover. Over a year ago the prospect would have excited him. Imagine all of the great stories his writer's brain would have concocted. Now it just put a knot in his stomach and wouldn't let him sleep. How things had changed.

Their phone conversation kept replaying itself in his head. She had just become a detective. The higher ups pulled her for the undercover assignment because she spoke fluent Russian. She'd spent a semester there, which meant she had first hand knowledge to weave into her cover story.

_Katya_. The name sounded so sexy the way she'd said it over the phone in her Russian accent. He closed his eyes and tried picturing her as the struggling student immigrant who was desperate enough to start selling drugs to survive. When the case had closed they had taken down a major drug distribution ring, or at least they should have. Most of the main players had been put away but not Andrei Zukov. Kate said the sleazeball's high priced attorneys held the case up for years. In the end he walked away on a technicality. Now he was back in business, same game as before and even more determined to cover his tracks.

Rick sighed staring at the ceiling. Of course she'd agreed. Kate wasn't one to walk away from a case and she still felt like this one was hers. So she was going back to finish the job. She'd done her best to explain it, to ease his mind. Said that her cover was still intact. When it all went down the first time Katya was arrested with everyone else. They'd made it look as though INS had deported her. She wouldn't be the first immigrant to sneak back in for a second try.

And he had to admit, the way she told it, it made sense. Made a good story. But right now he didn't want a good story. He wanted Kate sleeping next to him safe in his bed. Two days. It should all be wrapped up in two days. Until it was he figured he wouldn't be getting much sleep.

...

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	3. Chapter 3

_Hurry home._ Kate smiled at the thought. Since when had being with Rick felt like being home? It made her stomach flutter. She shook herself from her reverie. _Focus._ Letting her mind wander like that was dangerous. Not that serving drinks in a seedy, backroom club took a lot of brain power but doing it as Katya meant keeping her head in the game. She was surprised how quickly the role had come back to her.

Kate looked up as Lena called her back over to the bar.

"Nick's been staring at your ass all afternoon. Why don't you bring him his drink?" Lena gave a playful smile

Katya rolled her eyes at the comment as she leaned into the bar. "He's cute. What's he like?"

"He's close with Uncle. Tempting, but too serious for me. Maybe more your type?" With raised eyebrows she handed Katya the tray.

Lena was Andrei Zukov's niece and Katya's old friend. Somehow, Lena was friendly and trusting despite the world she lived in. She knew about her uncle's business the same way one would know about any other family business, as though they owned a bakery or ran a dry cleaners. It was simply a part of her life and she didn't question it. Lena was Kate's _in_ to this world the first time. She'd introduced Katya to the people who could help her make a little extra money by selling their product. Drug dealing had been Lena's way of helping her struggling new friend make ends meet.

The meeting at the market the previous morning was a set up. Surveillance knew Lena shopped at the local market most mornings. It was just a matter of placing Katya in the right place at the right time.

"Katya, is that you?"

"Lena? Oh my God! Da. It's me. How are you?"

"Oh Katya, I'd heard they sent you back home. What are you doing here?" Lena seemed genuinely concerned for her old friend.

"Da, after they arrested me they sent me back to Russia but I couldn't stay away. Getting back took all my money so I come to Little Odessa to find a job."

They conversed like the old friends Lena thought they were. Kate fell into her role as Katya with ease, her Russian and mannerisms coming back to her quickly. Just like that, Kate was back under.

...

Detective Nick Drychek worked this case for almost a year and he was so close to taking Andrei Zukov down he could taste it. Tomorrow. Zukov usually didn't handle the transactions. Someone else dealt with the actual handoff of money and drugs. That's why they hadn't been able to take down the son of a bitch. But this one was big. They were moving a huge amount of meth and the money was obscene. Zukov wouldn't trust it to anyone else. His hands were going to get dirty this time. That was when they'd nail him.

Drychek couldn't wait. His adrenaline was already pumping and it caused his back to ache. The old injury just wouldn't leave him be. Luckily his current environment gave him plenty of options for making it go away. Pulling the pills from his pocket he downed them with the last of his drink. It seemed like he was taking more of these every day but the case was almost over. He just needed them until he got Zukov put away. Once the case was closed and the stress of being undercover gone he was sure he'd get rid of the damn things for good.

What he wasn't sure about was this new detective on the case, _his_ case. The higher ups thought it was better to have a second set of eyes in place when this thing went down. He really didn't think they could pull it off this fast but they'd said she'd worked the case the first time around and her cover would hold. He'd been told she was good. But if she and that team had done their damn jobs the first time he wouldn't have been stuck in this backroom dive in Brighton Beach for the last year.

Whatever he thought about her abilities as a cop, he had to admit she was hot. It made it easy to keep an eye on her as she served drinks in Zukov's private club. He certainly didn't mind watching her from across the room and no one would question why he was. What he didn't like was the idea of the detective keeping an eye on him. He'd had to bend some rules to get this close to Zukov and his crew. He didn't need to justify his actions to some hot shot blonde in tight jeans, even if she was a cop.

...

It had been two days. The elevator at the precinct slowly rose as Castle's mind's was working a mile a minute. He still wasn't sure what he'd say to her. Why hadn't she called him last night? He'd just assumed she'd come over or call when the case was done. But she never showed. And no matter how many sleepless hours he spent staring at his phone, it hadn't made a sound. Castle awoke this morning tired and disappointed. Not only had she kept him out of the case but she hadn't even called when it was done.

His mind was spinning with doubts and questions. Maybe she wasn't taking their relationship as seriously as he was. They hadn't officially been a couple all that long. Perhaps they weren't on the same page. Kate found it difficult to express how she felt. There were times she was hard to read, even for him. But then there were the moments when she looked at him, the way she responded to his touch and he'd swear she felt it too. That what they shared was real.

The elevator doors opened and he rounded the corner determined to find out what was going on. He looked over to her desk and stopped in his tracks. Her chair empty, her desk untouched. Where the hell was she?

...

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	4. Chapter 4

Sitting on the floor of a dirt cellar, Kate tried to assess her situation. The room was dimly lit. The light source behind her, she couldn't see it from this angle. Trying to turn made everything ache and what didn't ache out and out hurt. She felt dizzy, her stomach queasy, and she was _so_ cold. She really wished she'd worn a jacket today. Random thoughts streaked through her mind as she struggled to keep control.

Her head fell back hitting the wooden post she was secured to. Her hands were somehow fastened above her head. She was having trouble feeling her fingers and her arms just tingled. What was happening? Had she blacked out? She fought to gather her thoughts. From the way her head and stomach felt she guessed someone drugged her. Whatever it was it had taken hold of her pretty quickly. The last clear memories were from the club and she desperately tried to remember what had gone wrong. Kate's head spun mercilessly as she attempted to piece together the events of the last two days.

...

...

Kate and Nick managed to work out a plan while flirting with one another throughout the day. It gave her and the undercover detective the excuse for some quiet conversation that no one would question. The fact that Lena kept pushing them together only helped.

"The meth will be delivered tomorrow night but Zukov's too on edge. Not givin' out details until just before the swap." Nick whispered in her ear as they pretended to canoodle over a small corner table. "If it goes down quick I might not be able to call it in so you'll have to. Stay close and I'll find you and fill you in. No one should question me givin' my hot new squeeze a good bye kiss" and for effect his lips lightly brushed her cheek.

Kate knew they had an audience. She nodded, giving her best girlish giggle. "I'll keep my eyes open." She smiled back at him coyly and made her way back over to the bar.

As Kate left Nick's side she noticed Marina, another waitress glaring at her from across the room.

"Marina have a problem with me?" she asked Lena quietly as she refilled a drink order.

"Oh, she's just jealous. She's had a thing for Nickie for a long time now but he won't touch her."

"Why not?" Marina was a curvy blonde, just a little shorter than Kate. Certainly pretty but that scowl on her face wasn't exactly attractive.

Lena gave a sly grin, more than willing to share the gossip. "Marina and Viktor used to be an item. Nickie isn't about to pick up Vik's sloppy seconds."

_Ouch_. Kate made a mental note to try and steer clear of Marina over the next two days.

At the end of the first night Katya was cleaning up behind the bar when Viktor came back and poured himself a drink. Viktor was in Zukov's inner circle but Kate knew few details about the man. She was about to learn more than she wanted. She gave him a pleasant smile and went about her work stacking the clean glasses under the bar. When she stood up and turned around Viktor was practically on top of her. He was a big guy, about 6'4" and he towered over her pinning her back against the bar.

"I hear you're showing Nickie a good time. How about the rest of us?"

Viktor's voice was predatory. The mixture of his body odor and the whiskey on his breath in such close proximity overwhelmed her senses. Kate's gut reaction was to take this guy down but she had to control the urge. Detective Kate Beckett could drop him, especially when he wasn't expecting it. But Katya was another story. Her mind was reeling as she tried to find another way out of this. Before she could react she heard Nick's voice behind her.

"Viktor. I would have thought your regular blyadishcas would be enough for you?" Although Vic loomed several inches over him, Nick's confident tone and unflinching stare had the desired effect.

Kate watched Viktor's body stiffen as he took a small step back. It was just enough for Katya to slip past and make her way to the other side of the bar. Just out of arms reach but still within earshot.

"You laying claim to this one Nickie?"

"What if I am?" Given the menacing looks the men were sharing there was obviously no love lost between them.

"You might want to learn to share the next time you need that extra oxy kicker." Vik's voice now cool and intimidating. "I've been quiet about you pocketing that much of the house stash but I think I'm starting to feel more talkative."

With that Viktor left, passing Katya with a leer and a smug smile. Kate let out the breath she was holding. What the hell was that about? Oxy kicker? She turned back to look at Nick and found him glaring at her before he turned on his heel and stormed out the door.

Nick was fuming. _Had she heard that?_ Of course she had. She wasn't standing that far away. Damn Viktor, damn the bloody pills, and damn her! He didn't need her here. He'd done this job for a year without backup. Why did they think he couldn't handle it now? She did nothing but bring him unwanted attention and he certainly didn't need another detective watching over his shoulder waiting for him to screw up.

He stalked out of the club, sweating and trying to catch his breath. One more day. By this time tomorrow he'd be done with her, with Zukov, Viktor, all of it. He'd throw the damn pills away and go back to his life. He fished around in his pocket and pulled out two more tablets. He just needed them to calm down. Tomorrow this would all be over.

…...

...

The first day Kate had been undercover, Castle spent most of it writing Nikki Heat. Nikki was working undercover in a high end strip club. Rook was there as a VIP patron, able to observe and assist in keeping her cover intact. Writing kept him from worrying and had the added benefit of letting his characters do what he couldn't himself. Castle had spent hours writing scenes that would probably never make it into a book.

He'd spent day two trying to tamp down on the anticipation of Kate coming home. Not that they lived together. She still had her own place, of course. But it just felt like the right phrase to use. It fit how he felt which made him wonder if she felt the same.

He'd called Esposito once that afternoon to see if there was any news. Apparently he knew someone on the task force and was able to get some information. Esposito's contact couldn't give many details but things were moving along according to plan and should be wrapped up some time that night.

So when 8pm turned into 11pm with still no word from her he became anxious. When he was lying in bed staring at the clock at 2am that anxiousness was coupled with a distinct sense of disappointment. His primary thoughts the last two days had been about where she was, what she was doing, and when she'd be back. That nagging little voice in the back of his brain was beginning to wonder if getting back to him ranked quite as high for her.

By the time he walked into the precinct the next morning the disappointment and doubt had pretty much taken over. Then he saw her desk. The chair hadn't moved, the computer was off and the coffee mug was empty. That's when he realized she wasn't there and the worry came crashing back in.

Ryan was sitting at his desk.

"Where's Beckett?" was his only greeting.

Ryan looked up with a knowing smile. "I don't know Castle. I thought she'd be with you." Castle and Beckett's personal relationship wasn't exactly public knowledge but when you worked with a room full of detectives, secrets were hard to keep. Ryan's amused grin left his face when he saw his friend's obvious concern. "I assumed the Captain gave her the day off after that undercover op. You really haven't heard from her?"

The knot that formed in the pit of his stomach when he'd stepped off the elevator was growing. "No. Where's the Captain? Or Esposito?"

"Espo's in court this morning and I haven't seen the Captain yet."

Just then Captain Montgomery stepped off the elevator, brow furrowed, fists clenched. He looked over at them but never stopped walking.

"Ryan. Castle. My office."

When they entered Castle felt his stomach flip flop. He was sure he'd never witnessed that distinct expression on the man's face.

Montgomery looked at Ryan, then to Castle. Then let out the breath he'd been holding. When he finally said the words Castle's breath caught somewhere in his throat and his stomach dropped.

"Beckett's missing."

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	5. Chapter 5

Kate's eyes snapped open. She must have blacked out again. How long, she didn't know but the room was brighter now. There must be a small window behind her. Was it morning? She felt so disoriented. She closed her eyes, took a deep breath and let it out slowly, trying to get her bearings. Looking around the room, she tried to control her dizziness. The cellar was empty but the floorboards above creaked. Someone was definitely upstairs.

Kate shivered and her eyes drifted shut. _No!_ Her mind screamed, forcing herself awake. Still sitting on the dirt floor, her arms held above her head. She could no longer feel her hands and the pain in her shoulders was becoming unbearable. She had to stand up and get some circulation back into her limbs. Legs shaking she pushed herself upwards.

She staggered a bit, leaned against the post and looked at what was holding her. There were soft plastic restraints around both wrists. They were similar to zip ties but larger. The plastic piece between her hands had been pulled through a metal loop that was anchored into the wooden post. It wouldn't be easy to remove or break and without any feeling in her hands it was just about impossible.

How the hell had she gotten here? Memories were coming at her in waves similar to the nausea. She leaned up against the post and forced herself to breath deeply as she tried to recall how she ended up here.

….

….

As afternoon turned into evening on the second day, Kate fought hard to hide how wired she was. Andre Zukov was there for the first time since she came on board. When he came up to the bar to get a drink from Lena he nodded in Kate's direction. "Who is the new girl?" She couldn't hear exactly how Lena answered but Zukov never took his eyes off Katya. His icy stare made Kate's blood run cold.

Andre Zukov stood about six feet tall with a muscular frame. His dark hair was graying at the temples and there were more lines around his eyes since Kate had seen him last. The lines failed to soften his ruthless glare.

Katya gave him a polite nod as she walked past with her tray of drinks. Even with her back turned she could still feel his eyes boring into her.

To add to her nervousness Nick had barely spoken to her today. Perhaps he was just busy. The place was buzzing since Zukov showed up. Or perhaps he didn't want her to question him about Viktor's comments last night. Add to that Marina's snarky looks and Viktor leering at her and Kate couldn't have been more on edge. She plastered a smile on her face as she delivered her drinks and took a deep breath. In just a few hours this whole thing should be over.

….

….

Nick hadn't slept most of last night. Despite the booze and the pills that would normally calm him, his mind kept spinning. What had Kate heard? What did she think? Would she turn him in when this case was done? He never thought it would go this far. Months before he went undercover, he had been taking down a perp when he'd strained some ligaments in his back. It hurt like hell but thanks to some muscle relaxers and a few days off his feet, he came back to work as good as new.

Then almost six months ago a fight broke out here at the club. In his attempt to stop it he pulled his back out again, only this time it was worse. The Russians didn't have the best medical plan and he wasn't about to break cover for a back sprain. This case was too important and he'd spent half a year building it. So he dipped into the club's private stash of pills. Zukov didn't just deal in meth and the club ran it's own little pharmacy just for its distinguished patrons. They had almost anything you wanted on hand, for a price of course. Nick took a couple of oxycodone that first day just to get back up on his feet. He only planned on taking the two since his first injury had taken just a few days to heal. Unfortunately, every time he thought he had it handled the pain would come back. Now the pills were a daily habit he couldn't stop. All he really needed was for this case to be over. He just wanted his normal life back.

….

….

It was already late evening when Nick leaned over the bar startling Kate with his closeness. "Two hours," he said quietly in her ear. "I've called it in already. All you need to do is keep your eyes open."

Kate forced a coy smile to her face as she turned and noticed Viktor watching them from his table across the room. "Where's it going down?" She purred low so no one else would overhear. With his face just inches away she could see how bad off Nick really was. He looked pale and sweaty. Dark bags shown under his eyes and his breathing sounded shallow. Was it just stress over the upcoming bust or was there more to it? His demeanor added to the feeling of dread she'd been carrying around all day.

"Right here. Back room. I'll be waiting in the back alley to check the shipment when it arrives and escort it inside. Serve your drinks and keep your eyes and ears open. This should happen pretty fast once everyone's inside." Without looking her in the eye, Nick walked off toward the restrooms.

The next hour felt like one of the longest of Kate's life. She knew her own anxiousness was making it worse. Forcing herself to act normally, she made conversation with Lena as they worked behind the bar. The room was fairly empty except for Zukov's immediate crew. As they were cleaning the bar and restocking some supplies, Kate poured herself a soda.

"So you and Nickie seem to be getting pretty cozy." Lena said with her back turned to Kate as she stacked bottles on shelves.

Kate was leaning with her back against the bar facing Lena as they conversed. "Yeah, I like him but you were right about him being the serious type." She was tempted to find a way to ask Lena about the pills but decided against it. With everything about to go down the last thing Nick needed was having more attention drawn to him. Kate picked her soda up off the bar and changed the subject. "How about you? Anybody around here you're seeing?"

Lena chuckled lightly but didn't turn around as she continued to stock the shelves. "I stay away from anyone in Uncle's crew. Nick's one of the better guys but most of them are nothing but trouble."

"Lena, what will Katya think, you saying that about your druz'ya?" Kate jumped, startled as Viktor's voice boomed right behind her. With the background music playing through a speaker directly overhead she hadn't heard him walk up. How long had he been standing there?

"Christ, Vik! Stop sneaking up on people and help me move these bottle's into the back room so I can get it set up for Uncle's guests later."

Kate finished her drink and tried to shake off her uneasiness. The way Viktor looked her up and down every time he came near made her skin crawl. The room was fairly empty. Marina had left early saying she wasn't feeling well and she hadn't seen Nick since their conversation. Zukov was sequestered in the back room. They had less than 45 minutes until the shipment was set to arrive. Once everyone was inside the task force team would likely move in quickly using the element of surprise to their advantage. Until then there wasn't much to be done.

Kate continued restocking the bar. She reached down to move a larger box and as she stood back up her world slid sideways. She staggered back a bit and caught herself against the bar. She took a deep breath and rolled her eyes. She really hadn't eaten much today and only had one cup of sub par coffee early this morning. With a smirk she pondered how she had become so dependent on Castle for her caffeine fix. Just the thought sent a wave of affection through her as she pictured him making her a perfectly brewed cappuccino from his ridiculously expensive machine. She forced herself to shove the thought aside. There would be plenty of time for that once this job was done. If all went well she could be sharing a late night coffee with him in just a few hours.

Over the next 15 minutes Viktor went back and forth between the bar and the private back room several times as Lena sent him to haul back supplies as she set up the room for the special guests about to arrive. Every time Viktor passed by Katya his eyes raked over her body. She shuddered a bit. His sleazy, self-satisfied grin was making Kate's stomach turn.

That's when it hit her. It wasn't just Viktor. The room was actually starting to sway. What the hell was happening? It felt as though she had had too much to drink but all she'd had was a soda that she'd poured herself. Crap. She'd had it on the bar when Viktor snuck up behind her. What had he done? He could have slipped something into it then. Oh God.

Kate's breathing quickened and she fought to steady it. She might not have much time. Lena was in the back room with Viktor. She really wasn't sure how much she could trust Lena. A wave of nausea made her want to head for the restroom but that would be the perfect place for Vik to corner her. Where the hell was Nick? She hadn't seen him in over an hour. Maybe he was outside waiting for the shipment. Kate made her way to the back door. He should be out there and the fresh air might help buy her some time.

Kate staggered into the alleyway looking right, left. No sign of Nick. There was nothing but some crates, a dumpster, and the old van that the club used to move supplies. Kate leaned against the van trying to catch her breath and make the world stop spinning. That's when she heard the door. She opened her eyes hoping to see Nick. Her luck wasn't nearly that good.

"Katya, what's wrong? Bednye dorogoi, not able to hold your liquor?"

Kate's heart caught in her throat. She didn't think she'd ever seen the ugly Russian look more smug, or intimidating.

...

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	6. Chapter 6

_**The only way I know you're reading is if you review, so when you take the time to say a few words I really do appreciate it. Now on to chapter 6…**_

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Esposito came off the elevator with a bounce in his step. He'd spent the morning in court and his testimony had gone well, really well. The dirtbag who murdered a waitress over a lousy bar tab was going away for a long time. Endings like that made this job worthwhile. He was feeling the high of one in the win column when he entered the bullpen. Beckett and Ryan weren't at their desks and his shoulders slumped. Had they caught a body without him? Then his glance drifted to the Captain's office and he stopped walking.

Ryan looked angry. Castle looked downright pale and he couldn't even describe the look on Montgomery's face. Something was very, very wrong.

Stepping into the office and closing the door he heard Ryan's outrage. "How the hell could she be missing? They _lost_ an undercover detective in less than two days?"

"What the hell is he talking about? Beckett?" Esposito stared questioningly at Montgomery, feeling his own anger begin to boil.

"I just came from task force headquarters." Montgomery started. "Something went wrong."

"Well there's an understatement." It was the first words he'd heard Castle speak since he walked in. They were said quietly but with an intensity he wouldn't have thought possible before this moment.

The Captain looked Castle directly in the eye. "Yes. It is. I need you all to sit down and listen. I'll tell you everything we know but this needs to stay quiet. If the media got wind of this it could put Beckett in a worse spot than she's already in."

….

….

Viktor smirked as he watched Katya struggling to stay upright, leaning against the van. Her eyes darting up and down the alley. This was going to be all too easy.

"No Nickie here to rescue you this time." He took two long strides forward reaching for her. Her leg came up towards his groin as the palm of her hand reached his nose. He caught her leg easily sending her off balance and she staggered. The hand made contact though. There wasn't enough power in the thrust to really hurt him, just enough to piss him off.

He sneered down at her, slamming the back of his hand into her cheek sending her careening to the ground. With one hand he opened the side door to the van. With the other he reached down grabbing her by the front of her shirt and hauled her inside like a ragdoll. Climbing in, he shut the door.

Again she flailed at him trying to strike a blow. This time he chuckled. "Katya sweetheart. Don't you know I like 'em feisty?" He easily grabbed her, shoving her down her head hitting the metal floor with a thud. With one big hand he grabbed her wrists and held them over her head as he dug his knees into her thighs, his full weight pinning her down. His free hand grabbed her throat and squeezed as she tried to yell out.

"You think you're better than the others? You think only Nickie can have you? You'll learn different." He breathed in her face looking into her drugged stare as she struggled for breath. Suddenly the front door of the van burst open and Andrei Zukov stepped inside.

Viktor looked up, shocked but not moving off of Katya. "Boss. What's going on?"

Zukov just shook his head as he took in the scene. "My PD informant just called. Cops are on the way."

"Tvoyu matʹ!" He rolled off of Katya and reached for the van door, ready to throw her to the ground.

Zukov stopped him. "Keep her. Informant says we got a traitor. Maybe more than one and it sounds like one of them could be a woman."

"You think its her?" Viktor gaped down at a now unconscious Katya lying under him.

"We'll find out. She's coming with us."

….

….

"What are we going to do?" Viktor asked. Anxiety clearly heard in his voice as he looked from his boss in the driver's seat to the unconscious woman sprawled out in the back of the van.

Zukov sighed as he steadily drove the van through the city streets. He looked sideways at Viktor. Everyone in his organization was now under suspicion but he'd known Vik since the old country. He'd eat his gun if Viktor had betrayed him. Of course he'd feed it to Vik first. "Go back there and see if she's got a cell phone."

Vik found it in Katya's back pocket and handed it to Zukov who took out his own phone. "Take yours out too. Pull the batteries and crush all three of them. If the cops know our phones they can trace us." With the phones in pieces they threw them in a public trashcan.

"We need to make sure we don't have a tail. Then we'll head somewhere I can work out our next move." The van pulled over. Up the block was a small electronics store that was still open. Andrei handed Vik a hundred dollar bill. "Go in and buy two prepaid phones." He'd need a safe way to make contact soon.

Later that night he finally pulled the van around the back of an older, white sided, nondescript house in Queens. The houses on either side in foreclosure kept things quiet and prying eyes to a minimum. It was just one of many places he kept off the books for times like these. His mind had been going through every member of his crew trying to narrow down the possible suspects. One was possibly a woman? Well that narrowed things down. There were no women in his inner circle but there were certainly women who were close enough to do some damage. The woman lying on the van floor had only been around a couple of days. It was unlikely but still possible. He wasn't about to let her go. Still, there were a couple of other possibilities and he'd check them out before the night was over.

….

….

Montgomery had the rapt attention of the three men in his office. "Detective Drychek called in last night giving the go ahead for the take down. Said the shipment would be coming to the club around 10pm. The task force guys saw a black Escalade pull into the alley next to the club. Within a few minutes it pulled out again. It was too fast. There hadn't been enough time for them to make the swap so they pulled over the Escalade and busted them on the street. Largest meth bust Brooklyn's made in years."

"What happened to Beckett?" Ryan interrupted unable to hold back the question.

Montgomery continued. "Once they secured the Escalade they took down the club but it was fairly empty. Zukov wasn't inside. Neither was Beckett. They found Drychek passed out on the men's room floor barely breathing. Looks like a possible drug overdose. He's on a ventilator at Coney Island Hospital."

"Drug overdose? They drugged him?" Esposito was back on his feet now, pacing.

The Captain took a deep breath before looking at him. "We're not sure. He's still unconscious so he can't be questioned. They're running more tests but the amounts they've found in his system suggest long term use. Oxycodone."

Javier was yelling now. "So they sent Beckett in at the last minute to clean up their frigin' mess and her only backup was an undercover addict?" He half spun on his heel, hands clenched in fists, turning away. If the walls weren't all made of glass he would have punched one of them.

Montgomery understood their fury but he needed to keep his team on point. "Who knew what and when is a discussion for another time Detective. The task force is interrogating everyone they picked up in the raids. The last time anyone saw Beckett was behind the bar about 9:30pm last night. Our only objective now is to find her."

Castle hadn't moved in his seat the entire conversation. His breathing was shallow and his mouth felt like sandpaper. He never took his eyes off the Captain. "How do we get her back?"

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_*I don't feel like this is one of the stronger chapters but it conveys a lot of information about what is happening to all of our characters. I tried to make it as exciting as I could._

_Let me know what you think. Thanks._


	7. Chapter 7

_**Thank you to everyone who reviewed the last chapter. It really inspires me to keep posting this story when I know you're reading. Now if I can just ask you to do it again? (Greedy, right?) Now on to Chapter 7...**_

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Castle felt like he'd been up for days, poring over copies of task force case files and reports that Montgomery had brought back with him. Desperately searching for any detail that might help, he'd used his speed reading skills to go through them the first time. Now he was reading them thoroughly. He needed to be sure he didn't miss anything. Kate was out there somewhere, waiting for them to find her. He wouldn't let her down.

Esposito went to pay a visit to his friend on the task force in the hope of getting more _unofficial_ information than Montgomery had gotten this morning. Ryan had driven out to the club. He wanted to see the scene himself, specifically looking for any neighborhood cameras or surveillance. Yes, there was a task force report listing traffic and business cameras but it had been compiled at the start of the case, almost a year ago. A lot could change and right now he wasn't willing to trust anyone who wasn't on his team.

Castle found himself rereading the sections detailing the bodies associated with but never proven to be connected to Zukov's crew. Over the years drugs, racketeering, kidnappings, and killings were all loosely linked to Zukov and some of the murders were brutal. Bodies or pieces of bodies were left in dumpsters, back alleys, or even put into plastic bags and left in the street. The victims were usually immigrants of some sort. With little evidence and communities that wouldn't talk to the police, these cases soon went cold. When Kate had told him about going undercover that night on the phone she had obviously been downplaying the violence involved with this crew. Probably trying to keep him from worrying. Damn it. The more he read the more his stomach tightened.

That's when Ryan strode past him motioning for him to follow. Castle's breath caught as he scrambled to close the files and follow into Montgomery's office.

"I think I found something." Ryan popped a disk into the Captain's computer. "There's a bodega across from the club. They've been robbed a few times and recently got a new security system including cameras. One of the cameras gives them a street view. The angle gives us a view of the alleyway next to the club."

He cued the video up to 9:34pm. Montgomery and Castle hovering over his shoulder. "Right there." Ryan pointed at the screen. "There's a woman walking into the alley. That could be Beckett."

The images were fuzzy, black and white, and a distance away but with the light in the alley there was just enough detail to make it out. Castle was holding his breath while he watched. It was definitely a woman but he couldn't swear it was Kate.

The woman seemed to be leaning up against a van when a large man came up behind her. Given the quality of the video it was hard to tell what was happening. But then Castle saw it and the breath he had been holding escaped his lungs all at once. The man hit her. Hard. She slumped to the ground. Then he reached down and tossed her limp body into the van.

"Keep watching." Ryan glanced up at Castle and let the video continue to play. Another man came out the door and into the alley heading straight for the van. After another minute the van pulled out and drove off.

"The time frame's right. That could be her." Montgomery said squinting at the screen. The van was white with three stripes that ran the length of the sides. There was no front license plate. "Why the hell didn't the task force guys catch this?"

"They were looking for a shipment coming in, not someone leaving. And their surveillance reports don't list this camera. The store owner just put it in days ago." Ryan stood up, grabbing the disk. "I'm going to check traffic cameras in that area for around that time. Maybe we can get a rear license plate."

"Check DMV records too. That van has to be linked to the club or someone close to Zukov."

"On it. Come on, Castle. I could use your help." He said it both because with Esposito not back yet he could really use another set of eyes and because he thought the man beside him might not survive if he didn't have something to do. Ryan had never seen Castle so pale or known him to be so quiet. He found watching Castle suffer twisted his gut almost as much as worrying about Beckett. They needed to find her fast, for both their sakes.

….

….

The waves of nausea and dizziness were starting to lessen but the desire to just close her eyes was the hardest to fight. Kate was exhausted and terrified. Her memories of the last day were jumbled at best. Was Zukov here? Had he been speaking to her? She thought so but it was like trying to see the road through dense fog. It was more the sound of his voice and her feeling of dread than an actual memory. She remembered feeling sick at the bar. Then somehow she was on the floor of a van with Viktor on top of her. That thought alone was enough to send her stomach churning but what was more frightening was that she couldn't remember what had happened next. All she knew was that the front of her shirt was torn and there was a sharp ache in her thighs that made it difficult to stand. Her eyes started to fall shut again. _Stop!_ She had to stay focused.

The feeling was starting to come back to her hands and God did it hurt. Her fingers felt as though they were on fire. She forced herself to ignore the pain as she got a better look at the restraints. It didn't take long to realize she wouldn't be able to break them, not without some help. But the metal hook that they were attached to was just the slightest bit loose. When she pulled back with both hands she could make the metal move in the wooden post. It was just millimeters but it was something. It might be all she had.

Then she heard the loud creak of old hinges as the door at the top of the stairs opened and she quickly sat back on the ground. She dropped her chin to her chest and closed her eyes. She couldn't play possum forever but the longer they thought she was incapacitated the better off she might be.

"Katya. Open your eyes dorogoi. You must be awake by now." Zukov's tone didn't leave much room for argument. If she didn't open her eyes she was fairly sure he'd open them for her.

Kate lifted her head to look at him, hands still secured above her she wasn't in a position to argue.

"That's a good girl. Now, do you know why you are here?"

"No." Her voice was low and scratchy and she realized that her throat hurt along with everything else.

"Well, then I should explain." His icy stare never leaving her face. "The cops were on their way to raid my bar last night and stop a business deal that was very important to me. I was just thinking that when you worked for me years ago, we had a problem with the police. Now, here you are back again. You are bad luck for me Katya. The police seem to follow you." His penetrating eyes seemed to look straight through her.

Kate's mind was spinning. Did he know she was a cop and was toying with her or was he just fishing and trying to get information. Her only option was to play dumb.

"I'm not bad luck Mr. Zukov. Lena asked me to come work at the bar. Last time cops arrested me too. They sent me back to Russia. I don't know anything about police." Kate may have had to fake the accent but not the shaking in her voice. She knew her life was on the line.

"If it is not bad luck, then you certainly have bad taste in boyfriends. Nick is a cop." He just glared at her waiting for her reaction.

"No, not Nickie." Crap. She was hoping the surprise on her face was convincing. If Zukov knew…Oh God, was Nick dead?

As if satisfied with her reaction and reading her thoughts at the same time he turned and walked towards the stairs. "Your precious _Nickie_ is in hospital." Venom fueled his words. "Not only is he a cop, he is also a bad one. He was using too much of my product. Serves him right if he doesn't wake up, although I'd like to finish the job myself." He turned back to her before climbing the stairs. "Relax Katya. Viktor will be back soon and then we'll decide what is to be done with you."

As soon as Zukov had closed the door behind him Kate got up and pulled hard on the restraints. Her wrists ached from the strain. The damn hook didn't budge.

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*_Well, we're about half way through and with everyone looking for Kate they should start to make progress soon, we hope. As always reviews make me endlessly happy and encourage me to post faster. Thanks to all. _


	8. Chapter 8

**_Here goes Chapter 8. I'm afraid we're in for a bit more angst. Please let me know what you think by reviewing. Thank you._**

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Rick's stiff muscles ached and his eyes had gone blurry from hours of reviewing traffic video and reading files. His shoulders slumped, it had been hours and they were still no closer to finding her than they had been this morning. Every lead they followed seemed to be a dead end. How could this be happening?

He always knew Kate could get hurt on the job. In his head he knew but he kept the thought tucked away in the back of his mind. Where it wasn't quite real, where it didn't have the power to truly terrify him. This was different. This wasn't some plot twist in a Nikki Heat story. This scared the hell out of him in a way nothing else ever had. There was the time he'd turned around in the park and Alexis was gone. His eyes had only left her for a minute while he chatted with a pretty single mom. Alexis had wandered over to pick flowers on the other side of a tree that blocked his view. Not knowing where she was had been the longest six minutes of his life, until today.

There had to be something. Something they were missing. Something they hadn't found yet. His jaw tightened as he desperately tried not to think about what might be happening to her right now. When his mind went there it paralyzed him and he couldn't breathe. He couldn't let himself panic. He wouldn't. If the roles were reversed, Kate wouldn't allow herself that weakness. At least that's the way he knew she'd see it. Weakness. She'd press harder, dig deeper. She'd search out new leads and reassess previous ones. Kate Beckett was extraordinary. She wouldn't quit until she found a break in the case and neither would he.

The images on the computer screen were starting to blur. He needed some more coffee to keep going. He took a deep breath and pulled himself out of his chair. He strode into the break room and without even thinking pulled out two coffee mugs. When he put them down in front of the espresso machine he realized what he'd done. He stared down at them and felt his jaw quiver. His stomach was so tightly knotted that it actually hurt. He picked up one mug but found his hand was shaking so he put it back down, closed his eyes and took a deep breath. When he opened his eyes he picked up the mug again, poured himself some coffee and walked back out into the bullpen. He could do this. He _had_ to do this. Kate was out there somewhere and she was counting on him. He couldn't let her down.

….

….

Viktor was driving back to the house. He'd been out twice in the last twelve hours. The first time was to gather information from his contacts on the street. That's when he found out that last night's shipment had been raided by the cops. Even more surprising was that Nick was one of them. Bastard. He'd never liked Nick. Arrogant little prick thought he was better than everyone else. He weaseled his way in and tried to take his place with Zukov. Thought the women Vik had had weren't good enough to share his bed. Well, now Nick was lying in a bed, tubes stuck down his throat. Only a few little pills took him down. Vik chuckled at the thought. The traitor couldn't even go out like a man.

They'd be leaving this house soon, needing to get out of the city. They couldn't be sure how far the breach had reached into the organization but Zukov had strongholds in Jersey and Philly too. Heading there would certainly be safer than staying here.

Vik parked the van behind the house. As he went to get out he saw he still had blood in between his fingers. He grabbed a rag from the back of the van to wipe them clean. With the loose ends being taken care of, they could leave this place soon.

….

….

Esposito had come back without much new to tell and he was frustrated. He just didn't buy that no one on that task force had a clue about Drychek's drug use. You don't cover a man for that many months and not see the changes. Maybe they thought they were safeguarding their case or perhaps they were protecting their friend and fellow cop. Either way, what they had done was walk Beckett right into the crosshairs of this mess. It was beginning to feel as though she walked out of that club last night and disappeared. Experience had taught him that the longer it took to find her, the worse the possible outcomes. He realized Ryan and Castle knew it too.

Montgomery called all three men into his office. "Close the door. Captain from the 60th said they might have a lead. He'll be calling back in a few minutes. Tell me what we have. Where are we on this?"

"We searched the traffic cams for a ten block radius from the club. The van never passed by them. They must know where those cameras are and were purposefully avoiding them. That's the only way they could miss every one." Ryan shook his head, obviously discouraged. "Without a plate number it's going to be a lot harder to track down."

Montgomery audibly sighed. "What else have we got?"

"Castle and I have been searching through DMV records but its slow going." Ryan looked over at Castle who picked it up from there.

"The problem is Zukov has so many associates and they all have aliases. It's taking a long time to run them down." Castle looked over at Ryan as a thought occurred to him. "Can we get a list of all the white panel vans registered in that ten block radius? If it's not listed to a name associated with the club then maybe it's someone close by and we can backtrack."

"That's if it's registered at all." Esposito chimed in.

"Do you have a better idea?" Castle snapped.

"Easy gentlemen. We follow all leads." Montgomery said before Esposito had a chance to respond. His team was on edge. No one more so than Castle, for obvious reasons. He figured Castle had never had cause to be this worried about someone he cared for and the strain was showing. Changing the subject he turned to Esposito. "What did you find out from your task force contacts?"

"Not much. Everyone is saying that Drychek's a good cop. No one saw the drug use but the docs are saying with the levels in his system, this wasn't a one time overdose. He'd been using for a while. Since he's still unconscious there isn't much more we can get there." Esposito was torn between wanting to feel pity for a fellow cop on a vent and feeling disgust over the man who put Beckett in this kind of danger. "The club was pretty empty when they raided it. Word spread fast though and a lot of Zukov's crew is in the wind. They're still working on tracking them down."

With that the Captain's phone rang and all three men held their breath while he answered.

Montgomery put it on speaker. "Yeah Bill, what have you got for me?"

"It's not good Roy. We found a body."

Silence filled the room. Castle's stomach clenched and it felt like the whole room slid sideways but somehow he stood on his feet. He just stared at the phone, no longer seeing it.

The voice on the other end of the line continued. "It's a woman. She's been beaten. Her body was left under the pier, most likely early this morning. Homeless guy found it and called it in. We just took her prints. They're on a rush over to the lab. We should know for sure if it's her in about thirty minutes."

Montgomery took a deep long breath, mouth suddenly feeling like sandpaper, he steadied himself. "Can you give me a description?"

"Her face is beaten pretty bad, Roy. She's caucasian, I'd say between 5' 7" and 5' 10", slim, blonde."

"Oh thank God!" Castle blurted out slumping over and holding onto the edge of the desk. He looked up perplexed at the Captain's expression. "Roy, it's not _her_."

Castle's thankful smile slipped away as he shook his head in confusion. Why weren't they relieved? "Blonde, Roy. It's not her."

The man across from him had such a look of relief on his face that Montgomery felt sick having to say the words. "Rick." He had to take another breath. "She dyed her hair blonde for the case."

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***_OK. Please don't hurt me. Did you like it? Hate it? Please let me know. It might make me post the next chapter sooner. Thank you for reading._**


	9. Chapter 9

_**I have to stay thanks to Max, iheartstana and sss396. Since your reviews are anonymous (which is totally fine) I can't send you a message back to say thank you…so thank you.**_

_**Now on to chapter 9. Enjoy.**_

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"No! No, no, no, no, no." It was the one word that kept running through his mind. This wasn't happening. That wasn't her. That simply wasn't his Kate. No one had beaten her to death and dumped her body under a pier. No. Just no. He gripped the men's room sink so hard he thought he could rip it off the wall. He had to get a hold of himself. They'd call back with the ID results and it wouldn't be her. Some other poor woman was beaten and left for dead but not Kate. Just not Kate.

Castle tried to steady his breathing but his chest was on fire. He turned on the cold water, splashed it on his face and stared into the mirror without seeing his reflection.

Rick closed his eyes and thought back to their last morning together. He'd woken up in her bed just as the sun was rising. He'd reached his arm around her waist and she'd snuggled her back up against his chest. His nose nuzzled her ear and he began to place soft kisses on the back of her neck. Still half asleep, she murmured something he couldn't make out so he just mimicked the sound back to her.

Kate chuckled lightly and rolled over to face him. Eyes still closed she rested her head on his chest. "I said _it's too early_. I'm sleepy. You kept me up too late last night." A small smile crept onto her face.

Rick grinned. "_I_ kept you up? I seem to recall you were the aggressor last night and I was the innocent victim." He felt as much as heard her giggle lightly into his chest. Two months ago he had never heard that sound before. That he could elicit it from her now felt like he'd won the lottery.

"Innocent?" Her grin grew wide as she looked up at him sleepily. "I don't think anyone could call you _innocent _Rick. At the very least you were a partner in crime." She purred reaching up to give him a quick kiss but pulled away before he could deepen it. "I'll make you a deal. If you let me get a couple more hours of sleep, we can play good cop, bad cop later."

"Ooh. Will you play the bad cop?" His smile was mischievous as he looked down at her but her eyes were already closing as she snuggled back onto his chest.

"Whatever you want." She murmured.

His hand trailed lazy circles over her back as he felt her body starting to relax into slumber again. "You are too good to me Detective." He lightly kissed the top of her head.

"Hmm. Don't forget it."

Castle had no idea how long he'd been standing at the sink when the men's room door flew open and Esposito thrust his head inside.

"Montgomery wants us in his office. They should be calling back with the ID any minute."

Castle found he couldn't speak. He simply nodded his head once, took a deep breath and followed Esposito out the door.

…

…

This was not a homicide investigation. That much Detective Ryan was sure of. This was a missing person case until someone gave him absolute proof otherwise. That meant Beckett was out there somewhere and they were going to find her.

He had watched Castle walk into the men's room and he hadn't come out yet. He considered going in to check on him but what would he say? The best course of action was to continue his investigation unless someone gave him reason not to. Anyhow, finding Beckett would help Castle more than any words he could think of.

Ryan decided to expand the traffic cam search. The task force had raided all of the homes of known associates anywhere near the club. That meant the van hadn't stopped near by. It didn't just disappear. It was out there somewhere and they couldn't avoid cameras forever. So he expanded his search pattern and his time frame. That's when he saw it and that's when the Captain called them back into the office.

Ryan, Esposito, and Castle walked into Montgomery's office just as he turned on the speaker phone.

"It's not Beckett, Roy. It's not her."

Castle collapsed into the chair behind him and dropped his head into his hands. Taking in a large gulp of air he let the relief wash over him.

Esposito gripped his shoulder, smiling. "It's not her, man. It's not her."

The voice on the other end of the phone continued but Castle barely heard the words.

"The woman is Marina Sluskya. She was picked up once in '07 for prostitution. She was a waitress at Zukov's club. We don't know yet why she was killed. I've got my detectives running it down."

"Thanks Bill. Keep me updated." With that Roy Montgomery sat down hard in his chair and took a deep, long breath. He and Castle just stared at one another in silent relief. Then he shook it off and looked at his detectives. "OK. Where are we?"

"I think I found something." Ryan hurried to his desk as the others followed.

"I expanded the traffic camera search and found this." He cued up the video. A white van with stripes was pulled over on the side of the road. There was no front plate. A big man jumped out of the passenger door. He walked into a store. From the angle they couldn't see which store but he walked back out about five minutes later and the van drove away. They couldn't get a good look at his face but there was definitely another man in the driver's seat. The rear plate was scratched and unreadable, certainly done on purpose to avoid being tracked.

"That's a camera on Avenue X in Sheepshead. It's 36 minutes after the footage we have at the club. From what we can see it's the same make and model, looks like the same striping on the sides, with two men inside. It's a big coincidence if its two different vans."

"And there can't be many stores open that time of night on that block." Castle jumped in, suddenly excited that they may have caught a break.

Montgomery felt optimistic for the first time all day. "Nice work. Go check it out and let me know what you find."

….

….

Kate assessed her situation. She was exhausted, freezing cold, and she desperately needed some water. She forced herself to shove all of that from her mind but it was getting hard to stay on her feet. The fragments of memories that threatened to disorient her didn't make it easier. She fought to remain in control. She'd looked over the old cellar. There wasn't much there, especially not within reach. There was a second wooden post across from her with two metal shovels leaning up against it and pieces of a broken cinder block at its base. Kate tried every position possible to stretch herself to reach any of it, hoping she could use something to break her restraints. No matter what she tried she always came up short.

Instead she pulled back on her restraints with all her might, trying different angles each time. The intense pressure against her wrists was already causing them to bruise. She squeezed her eyes shut against the pain and stifled a groan. Her arms ached and she was starting to lose feeling in her fingers again but little by little, the metal hook loosened. Not being able to come up with another plan, Kate just kept trying.

A loud creak over her head stopped her. Someone walked into the room above. Kate heard low voices, closed her eyes and tried to listen. The sound was too muffled to make out words but she was sure it was Zukov and Viktor. It wouldn't be long now before they came back down here. She took a deep breath and pulled again with everything she had.

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_**I'd love to know your thoughts on this one. It was hard to get everyone's reactions right. And then there is that flashback. Please hit the little button down below and let me know what you think. Thanks.**_


	10. Chapter 10

_**To everyone who read and reviewed, you are just fantastic! I try to respond to everyone so to my anonymous reviewers: Cheernbhappy, Anastasia, and Max, thank you too. Now, on with our story…**_

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Esposito, Ryan, and Castle ran over to Nostrand Ave and Avenue X in the Sheepshead Bay section of Brooklyn. A couple of miles away from the club in Brighton Beach, it was still their best lead. That van had stopped on this block; now to figure out why. With quite a few storefronts they narrowed down their options in order to save time. The Laundromat, pizza, Chinese, or food markets seemed unlikely although they'd check them all if they needed to. That left the pharmacy and Active Atom electronics. They started with the electronics store.

The manager cooperated showing them the security camera footage. Being an electronics store the digital video was crystal clear. When the footage hit 10:11pm a large burly man walked through the front door and Castle practically jumped out of his skin.

"That's him! That's…" He closed his eyes, snapping his fingers and flipping through the case files in his mind. "Viktor. Viktor Porchenko. He's one of Zukov's enforcers. Came over from Russia with him. A couple of assault convictions and suspected for more but never convicted. That's him." The words came flooding out in one breath as he pointed to the screen.

Esposito looked from the monitor to Castle. "You're sure?"

"Absolutely. I've done nothing but look at case files all day. I know that face." His jaw set, Castle didn't take his eyes off the screen.

The store manager printed out photos of the man while they looked at the rest of the video. Viktor bought two prepaid cell phones. Esposito's heart started hammering. This was their break. "We need the serial numbers and information for those phones."

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"Is everything done?" Zukov asked as Viktor walked in.

"Da. If it was her, she won't be talking to anyone." Viktor spent the night trying to unearth the identity of their second cop. Although Katya was a possibility, she had only been around a couple of days. It made more sense that it was someone else. Zukov mentioned Marina. Just the idea made Viktor paranoid.

Marina had been his girl for a while. Of course she wasn't his only girl but Zukov knew about their relationship. If Marina were a cop, he'd certainly look bad. It could even make Zukov question his loyalty. He couldn't let that happen.

When he went to find her he remembered the last time he was at her apartment. He was drunk when he ended up on her doorstep. They'd broken up over a month earlier and she wouldn't let him in. "You weren't any good in bed sober," she'd yelled loud enough for the neighbors to hear. "Why would I take you back drunk?"

How dare she embarrass him like that? "You stupid blyad! Open the door or I'll break it down." That's when Nick called his cell saying they had a job and he was needed at the club.

_Nick_. Marina had been sniffing around Nick for months. As Viktor pulled up in front of Marina's apartment his blood boiled. He wouldn't let her make a fool of him. Let her ruin his place in Zukov's eyes. She denied everything, of course. Cried and begged him to stop. He hadn't intended to kill her. Once he started hitting her, her pathetic tears just fueled his rage. A blind fury took over until he ceased to hear her feeble sobs. Noticing the blood streaking her blonde hair, his fist finally ceased in its assault but the crumpled body on the floor had stopped moving.

….

….

"What else do we need?" Viktor asked as he rechecked the bullets in his gun clip.

"Nothing. I need to make a couple more phone calls and then we'll leave." Zukov nodded towards the cellar door. "Finish things up downstairs. Make it quick and make sure the neighbors can't hear. Leave her body down there. We won't be coming back."

….

….

Castle sat in the back of the car as Esposito called the Captain and Ryan checked on the cell phone records. This was it. He could feel it. His heart was pounding in his ears. He swallowed hard trying to steady his breathing. They were going to find her. _Hang on Kate. We're coming._ He sent up a silent prayer. They had to find her.

"They got it! The phone's in use now!" Ryan blurted out as he scribbled down an address. "Ozone Park, Queens. Go." He flipped on the lights and sirens as Esposito slammed the gas pedal to the floor.

Castle didn't say a word. He just held on to the side handle as Esposito barreled around a corner, tires squealing. He found his feet pushing against the floorboards silently willing the car to go faster.

….

….

The voices above continued as Kate pulled against the restraints with all she had. It was close, so close. She angled her foot against the post and drew back using all of her body weight. She winced against the burning pain searing through her wrists. A little more; a few more pulls and it just had to give.

Then the cellar door opened and she quickly stood up straight, pushing the loose hook back into the hole hoping no one would notice. As Viktor came lumbering down the stairs she froze. The cocky sneer on his face made her stomach tighten. Nothing about this was good.

"Katya, have you been waiting for me?" He actually walked past her and she had to turn to see what he was doing. Taking his gun out of his waistband, he laid it on the ground next to the wooden post across from her. Her eyes locked on it. At least she knew it was there. It was an option if she could find a way to get to it.

"Oh, you'll have no need for that Katya. Besides, we have something to finish first."

That's when she realized he was undoing his belt buckle. _Oh God. _She turned back to the hook that held her. Could one more pull do it? Bracing herself for one last try it was already too late. He'd moved quicker than she'd expected. Viktor's body pressed up behind her, gripping her hair, forcing her head back to look at him. His hot breath on her cheek and neck, she swallowed hard as her stomach lurched. His free hand fumbled with the button and zipper on her jeans.

"You think you're better than the others. You're no better. No better than Marina. No better than that _coward_ Nick." He let go of her hair but his thick, rough hand grabbed onto her throat instead and squeezed.

Kate was gasping for breath. Tears that she couldn't stop pricked at the corners of her eyes. Her arms flailing, desperately fighting the restraints that kept her hands from breaking free. All she could hear was Viktor's voice in her ear.

"No reason why you shouldn't have a little fun before you die." With that he plunged his one hand inside her jeans. He finally released her neck, his hand now grabbing her hip.

A wave of nausea threatened to overtake her. There was nothing left to lose. She took a deep breath in, pulled her head forward and sent it careening back straight into Viktor's nose.

"You stupid bitch!" He spat and pulled back from her. He put a hand to his face feeling as much as seeing the blood dripping down. The obviously broken nose sending him into a rage, he clenched his fist, pulling back to strike her.

Without pausing to shake off the throbbing in the back of her head Kate put her foot against the post and heaved backwards with all the force she had. The metal hook finally broke free sending her spiraling to the ground just as Viktor's fist flew forward. The lack of contact sending him off balance and landing on top of her.

Her hands still fastened together, Kate fought to get him off of her. She was able to bring her knee up to his groin but not with nearly as much power as she hoped. It was enough to get him to roll to one side.

Viktor groaned and stumbled trying to get up, tripping on the shovels behind him they clattered to the ground. That's when Kate realized he was going for his gun. Struggling to get to her feet, she was on all fours as he reached down and grabbed the weapon. With his back still to her, Kate laid hands on the long handle of a shovel knocked to the floor. Getting to her knees she swung and hit the back of his legs.

A gunshot rang out hitting the back wall as Viktor toppled to the floor, the weapon still held in his grasp. Kate saw him turn back towards her in what felt like slow motion. Gun gripped in his bloodied hand, the look in his eyes was chilling, equal parts ice and fury. He was going to kill her.

Kate got back up to her knees, gripping the shovel with both hands she swung with every ounce of strength left in her body. The metal shovel connected with his skull making a sickening crack just as he pulled the trigger.

….

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_***I know. Another cliffhanger. Don't hate me. But please write a few words and let me know what you think. Thanks.**_


	11. Chapter 11

_**Thank you to my anonymous reviewer Anastasia as well as everyone else. Your reviews are amazing and inspire me to write more. Now back to the edge of our cliff…**_

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Esposito pulled the car over on a quiet street in Queens, parking a few houses down from their destination. The appearance of the older, dirty white home with peeling paint and broken shutters gave no indication of what to expect inside.

"What are we waiting for?" Castle's hand was on the door handle. His _Writer _vest on, ready to jump out.

Ryan and Esposito looked at one another as they checked over their weapons. Ryan answered. "Backup Castle. They'll be here in less than five."

"But..."

Esposito cut him off. "_But, _we don't know what we're walking into in there. The less prepared we are the worse it could make things. Backup will be here any minute." He looked at the anxious man in the backseat and felt a wave of compassion. "If Beckett were here, she'd wait."

"And Castle?" Ryan continued as he and Javier shot each other another look. "You need to stay in the car." He steeled himself, preparing for an argument. He didn't get one.

"Fine." Castle clenched his hand into a fist in frustration. "I'll do whatever you want. Just let me know if she's in there." His voice pleaded and his chest tightened.

Esposito handed him a radio. "As soon as it's clear, man, we'll call you in."

Castle nodded back just as they heard the gunshot.

The two detectives jumped from the car as a second shot sounded. Esposito calling "shots fired" into his radio as Ryan turned back to yell at Castle, "Stay in the car!"

….

….

Kate sprawled on the floor, hands still bound together, gripping the shovel handle. The only sound her own panting breath. She stared at Viktor slumped near her. Blood was pooling in the dirt from a large gash to the side of his head. His eyes were open, gazing at nothing. He wasn't getting up.

Kate dropped the shovel and tried to lift herself up. She noticed spattered blood on her arm and it took her a minute to realize it wasn't hers. Feeling the warm, sticky liquid that had sprayed over her arm, neck, and face, she shuddered.

The creaking of the floorboards above her grew louder. Zukov! Zukov was still here and could come down those stairs any moment. She quickly scanned the dimly lit room for Viktor's gun. It had flown from his hand when she'd hit him sending the bullet far off course from its intended target.

She saw the glint of steel near the wall and clambered over to it. Kate couldn't quite stand. She crouched on the ground by the wall, gun in hand, waiting for whatever came down those stairs.

….

….

Zukov heard Viktor yell out and the gunshots down below. He picked up his own weapon from the table, heading for the cellar. Peering down the darkened stairway his whole body jumped at the loud crash as the front door flew open. The police vest barely registered as he squeezed off a shot at the figure coming through the doorway. Andrei Zukov never got to fire a second round.

Esposito caught his breath, kicking the gun away from Zukov's body. He and Ryan systematically cleared the rest of the single story home before heading back to the stairwell where Zukov had stood. They listened carefully, not hearing a sound from below. The light dim, they took out their flashlights to get a better look as they descended the stairs.

"NYPD!" His gun trailed from the man's body on the floor to the light reflecting off polished metal that caught his eye. His heart hammering, his gun trained on the weapon before he recognized who was holding it. "Beckett?"

….

….

Castle sat in the back of the car gripping the seat in front of him with such force his fingers ached. His eyes closed, he tried to steady his breathing when the sound of more gunfire felt as though it was ripping through him. He looked from the house down to the radio next to him silently begging to hear something. He closed his eyes again. His heart felt like it was pounding right through his chest. _She's fine. She is going to be fine. _It was his mantra. His mind said the words over and over again until the squelch of the radio interrupted his thoughts. "Castle, get in here."

He took the front porch steps two at a time and burst through the doorway without thinking. Once inside the smell of gunpowder overtook him. Castle paused seeing Andrei Zukov sprawled on the floor between the living room and kitchen, blood spilling from multiple holes in his chest. He wasn't moving.

Ryan was coming up from a stairway, radioing in "Officer down. Ambulance needed at…" as he motioned for Castle to head downstairs. _Officer down_ echoing in his ears, he descended the stairs so quickly he fought to keep his balance. He scarcely noted the sound of sirens outside. Their backup had finally arrived.

By the time he reached the bottom of the staircase his eyes needed time to adjust in the dim light. A hardly recognizable Viktor Porchenko was crumpled on the ground, a large puddle of blood originating from his busted skull. He noticed the movement to his right. It was Esposito, crouched down and facing the wall. With several long, quick strides Castle was on his knees next to him, kneeling in front of Kate.

"Kate." His relief palpable, filling the one word. He looked over her form and his breath hitched.

The blonde hair shook him, making her appear even more pale in the dim light as she was peering back at him with unfocused eyes. Her wrists were bound together, her cheek swollen with a nasty bruise. Castle remembered the video taken outside of the club. Had it only been hours since he first watched it? It felt more like weeks. Lightly running his thumb below her cheek he felt a surge of fury course through him. For a brief moment he wished the man behind him were still alive, if only that he could crack his skull open himself. The thoughts turned his stomach and he brought his full attention back to the woman in front of him.

Esposito moved towards the stairs to meet the arriving ESU team as Castle assessed Kate further. That's when he noticed the dark drops over her arm and face. Dirt? He ran his hand down her arm and the sticky liquid smeared. Blood. Was she bleeding? He didn't see any obvious wounds but he couldn't be sure.

"Kate, how badly are you hurt? Can you move?" His own voice sounded strange in his ears.

"Yeah." Her voice hoarse, her eyes didn't quite meet his. "Just help me up." She struggled to stand.

"Wait" he pleaded as it became clear she needed help. "Just hold on." Castle gently took her bound wrists and lifted them over his head and around his neck. Then he scooped her up off the floor.

"Castle." She tried to object, instinct kicking in. Not wanting to look weak in front of other cops. Yet even with her plea, her forehead fell forward onto his shoulder.

"Shhh. Easy. Just let me get you out of here." Her body like ice against him coupled with the slight trembling of her frame fueled his determination to get her to safety.

Outside she squinted against the waning sunlight, leaning her head more soundly against him. The fact that saying his name in warning was her only protest to being carried out sent his worry into overdrive. He headed straight for the ambulance, placing her gently on the waiting gurney.

The EMTs surrounded her, assessing her injuries. "Ma'am? Can you tell us your name?"

"Beckett," her voice still raspy. "Detective Kate Beckett."

Hearing her say her own name, he released the breath he'd been holding far too long. He closed his eyes in silent thankful prayer, to whom he wasn't sure. As bad as things were, they'd found her. She was alive.

….

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_**I know this is a bit short but it covers a lot of action and I hope this chapter pulled you back off the cliff. The last three chapters of the story are definitely a bit longer. Since this is the case climax I'd really like to know what you think. Reviews are most appreciated. Thanks for reading.**_


	12. Chapter 12

**You guys have been amazing with all of the reviews. Please keep them coming. Now on with our story...**

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Castle sat in the waiting area of the hospital emergency room. Waiting. It seemed to be all he'd done the last few days. Waiting for Kate to come to dinner. Waiting for her undercover assignment to end. Waiting to find her. He was tired of waiting. He wanted to know she was OK.

During the ambulance ride he'd gotten a better look at her. Kate's face was bruised and swollen. She had contusions on her neck from being grabbed by the throat. Another man's blood sprayed over one side of her face and body. Horrible purplish black rings encircling her wrists from those damn restraints made him fear he could hurt her just holding her hand. But it wasn't until he was sitting in the ambulance that he noticed the front of her shirt was torn, the button and zipper of her jeans undone. And for the hundredth time today his breathing became labored as he fought the frightening conclusions threatening him.

Castle couldn't sit still. He considered calling her father but he didn't have his number. Then he realized he'd better ask her first. Pacing the ER waiting area, his cell phone rang. It was Alexis.

It hit him that he hadn't spoken to her all day and it was now late evening. He normally called her when he couldn't be home, even if it was just to check in and see how her day had gone. But not today. Answering the call he tried to sound as normal as possible. "Hi Sweetie."

He couldn't fool Alexis for a minute. "Dad? What's wrong?"

Castle took a deep breath. _Nothing? Everything? _His innate instinct to protect her warred with his resolution never to lie to his daughter. Still, it was hard to know where to begin and the exhaustion of the day was starting to take effect.

He let out the breath and began. "I'm at the hospital. Kate was hurt today."

"Dad! Is she OK?" Her alarm evident as her voice rose in pitch. "What happened?"

"She's going to be fine, honey." He silently pled it would be true. "The doctors are checking her out now. It's kind of a long story but she was working undercover and things went wrong. She was beaten up and…" He was at a loss how to finish the sentence. "She's going to be fine," he repeated, as much to calm himself as Alexis.

"Dad, I was supposed to sleep over at Paige's tonight. We're doing the whole spa day thing tomorrow but maybe I should stay home?"

"No, Alexis. You should go and have fun. When the doctors release Kate, I want her to come back to our place. As much as she'd love to see you I think the quiet will do her good. Is that OK with you?"

"Yeah, Dad. Of course. If you're sure? I love you. Tell Kate I hope she's OK."

"Love you too, Sweetie. Be safe and call me back when you get to Paige's." He hung up and dropped into the first chair he could find. He'd wandered to the other side of the ER without realizing it. When he saw the _No Cell Phone_ sign he pocketed the device and rested his head in his hands. That's when he overheard the conversation between a doctor and what he guessed was an intern standing by the desk several feet away.

"Continue the IV drip for the dehydration. Run a CBC and do a urinalysis for flunitrazepam. It's far too late to see it in a blood screen but we might still catch it in the urine. I want a CT and get an orthopedic consult down here. Those restraints may have caused some soft tissue damage to her wrists and she has some severe contusions on her inner thighs. There may be some muscle or tendon damage. Also run a sexual assault kit."

"You think she was raped?"

"It's possible." The doctor continued, his eyes never leaving his chart. "There are certainly indications. She says she remembers an attempt but that she blacked out more than once which is why I want the roofies test and the CT. Anyway, she called for the kit before I even suggested it."

"Strong lady." Surprise threaded the intern's voice.

"Yeah, well she's a cop. I guess that kind of training kicks in even in the worst of situations. Find me when you get those results." And the two walked off in different directions as a nurse came up to Castle.

"Sir, you can't be back here. You need to go back to the waiting area."

Too dazed to argue, he simply nodded his head, got up, and walked in the direction he pointed.

….

….

Kate lay on the bed in the ER in her thin hospital gown. Her arms crossed over her chest as she tried to force her hands to quit shaking. They wouldn't stop. The doctor said it was probably due to a combination of adrenaline, shock, and the injuries to her wrists but it just felt like one more thing out of her control.

Kate steadied her breathing. Knowing there were more tests coming and she had to remain calm. _One step at a time, _she told herself silently. At least the heated blanket was helping. She couldn't remember the last time she'd felt warm. And that was part of the problem. She couldn't remember. Her memories over the last day felt like they were made of glass and someone had smashed them to the floor. Some of the pieces were larger than others but some just seemed to be missing altogether. She hated it. Some memories were frightening. She knew what Viktor had attempted in the back of the van but couldn't recall how it ended. He tried a second time in the cellar just before she'd killed him. He was dead now and she shuddered recalling the crack of the shovel as it hit his skull_._

The memory of his warm blood landing on her cold skin assaulted her and she wiped at her face as though it was still there. _One step at a time,_ her mind repeated. Her only goal right now was to get through this day and go home.

….

….

Castle, Montgomery, Esposito, Ryan, and other police officers mulled around the waiting area. Hours had passed since she'd first arrived. Castle sat in a corner, unusually quiet. Sitting with his head in his hands, he looked lost. Ryan took the seat next to him, clapping a hand on his shoulder.

"It's over, dude. She's going to be alright." Castle looked over and nodded but his lips never formed the smile Ryan was hoping for.

"Beckett's strong. Give her a week she'll be back at work ordering us around before you know it."

Montgomery wandered over, overhearing part of their conversation. "I remember the first time Kate Beckett walked into my office. Don't ever tell her I said this but I may have wondered if the young woman standing at my desk had what it takes to be a homicide detective." His eyes smiled at the memory as he took a sip from his steaming Styrofoam cup. "But after working with her, hell, I'll take her strength over half the brute force we have in that precinct. Beckett's going to be fine, Castle. I don't doubt it for a minute."

Castle looked up at the older man, a small but thankful smile graced his features. He was right. Kate would get through this, no matter what.

About thirty minutes later the doctor finally came out asking for Richard Castle. Rick stood up and followed him just out of earshot of the others.

"Mr. Castle, I spoke with Ms. Beckett and-"

"Detective Beckett." Rick interrupted. For some reason the title seemed important even if he didn't completely understand why.

The doctor gave him a bemused look and began again. "_Detective _Beckett can be released from the hospital if she has someone who will stay with her the next 48 hours."

"I'll be with her the whole time." Rick jumped in before the doctor could finish the thought.

"Yes. She seemed to think you wouldn't mind." He was fighting a sardonic smile. "She gave me permission to share some of her medical information with you as you'll need it to aid in her care upon her release."

Rick listened with rapt attention and took the written instructions the doctor handed him but one question was screaming in his brain. Rick took a shaky breath and asked. "I know they ran a sexual assault kit. What were the results?"

The doctor looked back at the man in front of him wondering how he knew about the test. Then decided it didn't really matter how. "The results were negative. There was obviously an attempt and she did test positive for flunitrazepam, but no penetration and no fluids. Ms…Detective Beckett has already been given the results. A nurse will come back out to get you when she's ready to leave."

Castle went back to the waiting room, finally able to breathe.

….

….

Despite the ache of sore limbs, Kate managed to change into a pair of scrubs; her own clothing ruined and now part of a crime scene investigation. Anxious to leave, the doctor refused to release her unless someone would look after her the next few days. She'd tested positive for roofies. That coupled with the blow to her head meant she shouldn't be alone. As much as she hated appearing helpless, she softly smiled when she thought of Rick. He hovered over her as the EMTs had done their work, even wincing when they put her IV line in. She'd heard his slight gasp when they cut the restraints from her hands revealing the awful bruising. She was impressed with how quickly he'd tried to cover the reaction when she looked up at him then. His small smile and blue eyes sending her reassurance without words that everything would be OK. Castle didn't leave her side until the ER staff refused him access to the exam area. Her gurney facing the opposite direction she couldn't see his face but she didn't need to to know he was not happy. Her train of thought cut short as the curtain opened and the man himself pushed a wheelchair towards her.

"Milady, your chariot awaits." Castle made a dramatic sweeping motion over the chair.

She rolled her eyes. That one simple gesture sent relief coursing through his veins. He smiled for the first time all day.

Kate didn't think Castle's grin could get any wider. It was infectious and she smiled back despite the sore cheek.

His eyes lit up seeing the change in her expression. "I'm here to take you home." His voice softer this time.

Longing to hear those very words, Kate felt her tense muscles relax as she gazed back into caring blue eyes.

For the first time in days, she finally felt warm.

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**_As much as the suspense was fun to write, we now get to move on to more Caskett moments. I hope that is OK with everyone. I'm really curious to hear what you think about this chapter. Thanks for continuing to read._**


	13. Chapter 13

_**Thank you reviewers! I always enjoy hearing what you think, including my anonymous reviewers: Fog, Anastasia, ClaireBear4Ever. Since I can't send you a message, I will say thank you here. **_

_*Special note to ClaireBear4Ever: If you did write an e-mail address in your message, the site deleted it. Sorry I couldn't reply._

_**Second to last chapter. Thanks for reading.**_

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Castle ordered a private car to get them home. Montgomery, Esposito, or Ryan would have gladly driven them, or he could have simply called a cab but the private car would be far more comfortable and keep Kate's bruises from prying eyes. She didn't have to say she felt self-conscious. He could read her body language, the way she ducked her head, pulled her hair in front of her cheek. It made him want to get her home that much faster.

There was the first challenge. He smirked to himself as they settled into the backseat. How ridiculous was it to think of this issue as a challenge after the day they'd had? He decided to just ask her. "I'd really like to bring you back to the loft. I think we'd both be more comfortable but if you want to stay at your place we can go there instead."

Kate was silent for a moment, looking out the tinted windows into the darkness that had settled on the day. Then she turned back to look at him. He looked so hopeful, she felt a warmth flooding her chest. "The loft sounds nice. I'd like that."

Relief washed over him as Kate leaned back into the soft leather seat. As he put his arm around her shoulders he felt a brief moment of apprehension, realizing how quickly she had acquiesced. That wasn't normal but then again, nothing about today had been. As she angled more of her weight against his body he decided to stop driving himself crazy. She was here and they were going home. He placed a light kiss on the top of her head. They spent the rest of the ride in comfortable silence.

….

….

Kate didn't know how long she'd been in the shower when the knock at the bathroom door shook her from her thoughts.

"I'm fine." She called out to him. "I'll be out in a few minutes."

"There's no rush. I just wanted to make sure you were OK." Castle kept his tone as light as he could, given the circumstances.

He'd been nervous letting her shower alone. As she toweled off she smiled a bit at the thought. Normally he wouldn't have hesitated to jump in with her and most days she wouldn't have stopped him.

When they got back to the loft all she wanted was a hot shower. She needed to wash it all away, the blood, the dirt, the feel of him on her.

Rick worried. "I'm not trying to be a pain here but you're exhausted and between the effects of the drugs and everything else. You could pass out and…"

"I'm fine, Rick." She interrupted. He was right. She was exhausted but she just needed to step into the water and make this day disappear. Somehow her brain couldn't find the words to explain that to him.

"OK. Just do me a favor and leave the door unlocked. You can have your privacy but if something happens I'll end up breaking down my own bathroom door and I don't think either of us wants that." He tried to grin but she noticed it didn't reach his eyes. She nodded, willingly agreeing to the compromise.

The first thing that shook her was the hair. She wasn't expecting to see the blonde locks in the mirror and it stopped her cold. Then she inspected the bruises on her neck and her swollen cheek. She knew it hurt, felt the swelling, but hadn't known how bad it looked. After a few deep breaths she began to undress.

Kate was already strangely accustomed to the black marks around her wrists, having stared at them for so many hours. It was the bruises on her thighs that startled her. She knew they were there of course, had talked to the doctor about them but had never inspected them her self. Suddenly her mind flashed back to the floor of the van, Viktor above her, and her stomach turned at the memory. She stepped into the shower closing her eyes and tried to settle her mind as the warm water ran over her body. Viktor and Zukov were dead. The case was over. She was here, safe.

As Kate struggled to control her thoughts a small half grin formed. She wondered if Castle was waiting on the other side of the bathroom door and she couldn't help thinking back to one of their first mornings together. Slipping from her bed while he slept, she saw no reason to wake him while she got ready for work. She stepped into the spray of water and was adjusting the temperature when the rustle of the shower curtain startled her.

"Castle! I thought you were asleep."

He gave her a lazy grin as his eyes swept over her body. "I'm awake now and I thought you could use some help washing your back." He met her stare raising his eyebrows as his eyes darkened.

"I seem to have managed to wash my own back up to now." She teased even as she stepped into his embrace.

"Well you never know when you might miss a spot." He leaned down, kissing her soundly.

As the kiss broke, his lips began to trail down her neck. She whispered breathlessly, "I really do have to get to work."

"Then we better get you clean." His grin turned mischievous as he reached for the sponge hanging on the faucet.

"Let me get my body wash." She smiled and tried to reach past him towards the shelf on the opposite side, quickly losing her balance as their legs tangled in the narrow confines of the tub. Trying to break her fall she made a frantic grab for the shower curtain. Metal rings popping against the strain as the curtain tore from its fasteners.

He reached out and caught her but the unexpected maneuver caused him to slip as well. He managed to stop their descent by catching hold of the rim of the tub, holding her underneath him, just above the hard surface below.

"Are you OK?" He looked down at her startled expression.

"I think so but I don't think my shower curtain was quite so lucky." The curtain torn down was laying half across Rick's back, half outside of the tub. The spray of water was quickly covering the bathroom floor. He lifted her up, leaned back and turned off the water as they looked around assessing the damage. His one arm still wrapped around her, her forehead fell onto his chest as they both chuckled.

She shook her head, looking up at him. "I'm going to be so late for work."

He smiled back kissing the tip of her nose. "Next time, we try this in my shower."

….

….

Kate wandered downstairs wearing Castle's luxuriously soft robe he'd left hanging for her on the bathroom door. She found him in the kitchen making a tray.

"Hey, I was about to head back up."

"Well, I beat you to it. What's this?" She surveyed the counter and felt her stomach growl.

"I know you said you weren't up for food but I thought a little something might settle your stomach before bed." There was a bit of toast, crackers, cheese, and some cut up fruit.

She couldn't help but give him a weary smile. "Thank you." She slid onto a stool at the counter and began nibbling on the small feast he'd laid out.

He sat down next to her and brushed a damp piece of hair behind her ear. "Blonde, huh. I'd never pictured you as a blonde."

"And you never will again." Popping a strawberry into her mouth she read the unasked question in his eyes. "I did it the first time I worked the case. The senior detective back then thought it would make it easier for me to get into character. This time it was a matter of remaining consistent with that image." The weariness overtaking her was edging into her voice.

She was peering down into the tray but Castle could tell she wasn't actually seeing it. He fought to bring her back. "So I take it these blonde tresses will be turning brunette soon?"

"Definitely." She tried for a smile but couldn't quite manage it, the fatigue seeping into her bones.

"Good. I could get used to blonde but I prefer the original." He reached over and kissed her forehead. "You're exhausted. Why don't we head up to bed?"

She nodded, taking his hand and following up the stairs.

….

….

Kate thought she'd be the one to wake them up with nightmares. She was surprised when it was Rick's sudden movement that startled her awake.

"I'm sorry. I'm sorry." He repeated over and over, his breathing ragged. "You were…I thought…" He closed his eyes hard, tried to control his breathing but he still couldn't finish the sentence.

"I'm OK, Rick. I'm right here." She took his face in her hands, slowly turning him towards her. "Shhh. I'm alright."

"I'm sorry. I'm sorry." He ran his fingers through his hair and looked down at her apologetically. "Everything you've been through." He gently ran his thumb under her bruised cheek, cupping her face. "And I'm waking you? I'm so sorry."

She gave him a small smile then, looking into his eyes and kissed him softly. Then she curled up into his chest, pulling fistfuls of his t-shirt in her hands as if to bring him closer. He wrapped his arms around her and held her to him, both of them falling back to sleep without another word.

Of course that wasn't the last nightmare of the evening. She woke up too, closer to dawn.

"No! Stop!" She cried out, holding her throat, gasping for air.

Her back to him, Rick reached out and touched her shoulder. She visibly flinched at the feel of his touch and he recoiled as though he'd been shocked. Damn.

He wasn't sure what to do. Half afraid she'd bolt from the room if he tried to touch her again. "Kate?" He said softly, desperately trying not to make it worse. "Kate, it's OK."

She sat on the edge of the bed her head in her hands, visibly shaking. She let his voice penetrate the fog of the dream and forced her self to take a steadying breath, then another. Then she turned her head to look at him.

The look in her eyes, fear, confusion, sadness, it sent the breath from his lungs and he instinctively reached out for her one more time.

This time she accepted, letting him pull her back into bed. Voice trembling, she let out a ragged breath. "I'm sorry."

"Hush. There's nothing to be sorry for. Just come here." He was holding her now, tracing soothing circles over her back. "You're OK, Kate. You're safe here." His voice rough with concern as her tears dampened his t-shirt. "Everything's going to be OK." He continued to murmur words of comfort to her until they managed to slowly let sleep overtake them once more.

….

….

When they finally left the station the next day Kate was pale and dark circles were showing under her eyes. It had been a long afternoon but Kate had insisted on getting this over with.

"What is taking them so long?" Worried and exasperated, Castle was pacing in front of the Captain's desk. "Why are they grilling her like this?"

"They've got a cop laying in a hospital bed on a ventilator and a possible leak inside the department. Internal Affairs is just being thorough." Montgomery closed the file he'd been reading. "Tell you what. I'll go check out how it's going in there."

"Thanks, Roy." Castle sat down next to his desk as the man walked out. That's when the name on the folder caught his eye. _Beckett._ He couldn't help himself. He opened the file quickly recognizing the newly printed post incident report. His first reaction was to put his speed reading skills to use before Montgomery came back but he hesitated. Reading it felt like an invasion of her privacy. As much as he wanted to know everything that happened, it was right there at his fingertips, he just couldn't do it. She trusted him. Trusted him enough to come to his home, let him take care of her when she was hurt. He knew her well enough to realize how huge that was. He wanted to know but the decision should be hers. Maybe someday she would tell him but if not…

He looked up to see Kate walking into the bullpen with Montgomery. Castle sighed in relief. It was time to take her home.

….

….

"Kate!" Alexis bounded across the loft to give her a hug but stopped short. "You're…blonde?"

The two women looked at one another, then started to giggle.

"I know, right. I have the same reaction every time I look in a mirror." They hugged, both smiling, the anxiousness of the moment disappearing in friendly humor.

"Are you keeping it?" Alexis asked making a conscious effort to concentrate on the hair and not the bruises.

"No. I actually kind of hate it." Kate gave a tight smile and suppressed an eye roll. "I can't wait to change it back to my regular color."

The redhead's eyes lit up. "We can head to the salon tomorrow. I'm sure they can take care of that in no time."

Kate was unaware her hand had gone to the bruise on her cheek. "Thanks Alexis but not just yet. Maybe I'll make an appointment for later in the week." Walking into a precinct full of cops was one thing. Dealing with a salon full of gossipy hairdressers was something she wasn't quite ready for.

The subconscious gesture didn't slip past Alexis. "OK. Well, I just got home. I need to go upstairs and unpack. What are we doing for dinner, Dad?"

Castle shook himself from his reverie, having been absorbed in the moment between the two most extraordinary females in his life. "Ah…I'll have to check the fridge. We might order in."

"How about a movie night?" Alexis called down as she continued to ascend the stairs.

"Maybe, Sweetie." Castle turned to Kate. "Are you up for that tonight?"

The tightness she'd felt in her neck all day began to lessen as she let the stress and anxiety she'd been carrying ebb away. She gave him a small smile. "Yeah. Movie night sounds nice."

….

As the credits rolled no one moved. Alexis had fallen asleep, curled up in the leather easy chair. Lying on the sofa, Kate's head rested against Rick's chest, listening to the comforting sound of his heart beating. It was the first time in days she'd felt good, normal, safe. Rick's loft felt like a cocoon. She appreciated being included as part of the Castle family, even if it was just for a short while.

Castle was lying there watching her. Her breathing soft, muscles relaxed, the stress that lined her face earlier, now gone. He just wanted to freeze this moment, not wanting the world to steal her away. As if reading her mind, Rick spoke. "You could stay. Stay here with me, with us. You could keep your apartment, or not, whatever you want." His mouth went dry as he felt her body shift to look at him. "I like having you here. This could be home if you want it."

Kate stared up at him, eyes wide, lips parting. She couldn't breathe.

"You don't have to answer now. Just think about it, Kate." He reached down, guiding her chin up to him, kissing her gently. His breathy whisper so quiet she could barely hear it as she gazed back into soulful blue eyes. "I just need you to know, I want you here."

Kate's head spun as she snuggled back onto his chest. She truly didn't know what to say.

….

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_**So what did you think of our Caskett moments? I'm very curious to hear. One last chapter to go! **_


	14. Chapter 14

_To my anonymous reviewers: Lulu &, Anastasia – Thank you. _

_And to my amazing beta team of Whatarushh, NathanFan, & LadyBrenlis, Thank you for your time, patience, and talent. Without you we wouldn't be here. _

_**Almost 4000 words in this chapter, I hope it makes up for some of the shorter ones. I could have split it up but I thought this was a more satisfying ending. **_

_**Your reviews have been amazing. As this is my first long fic, it's really been a boost to my confidence. Thank you all for making this such a fantastic experience. I sincerely hope you enjoy the conclusion to this story.**_

_**

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...

"Thought I heard you were a blonde?" Lanie joked lightly as she walked up to the table. They'd spoken on the phone but hadn't seen one another since before Kate had gone undercover. Answering Kate's raised eyebrow, "Esposito and Ryan may have mentioned it in passing." _In passing_ meaning she had grilled them for details.

"Thankfully you heard wrong." Kate smiled as they hugged. Other than her doctor's exam and her mandatory police psychologist sessions, this was her first official outing. Grateful to see her friend, she felt the tension she'd been carrying melt away. "I got rid of the blonde a few days ago."

Actually, it had been Alexis' doing. They'd just finished a late breakfast. Rick was in the kitchen cleaning up while Kate went upstairs to change. As she was brushing her hair and sighing at the horrible color reflected back in the mirror she heard a soft knock at the door. "Come in."

Alexis stepped in, lips pursed, looking uncharacteristically timid. "Kate, are you almost done?"

"Yeah, Alexis. What's up?"

The young girl was staring back towards the doorway, not meeting Kate's eyes.

"I have someone downstairs for you to meet."

"Who is it?" Kate's brow furrowed, perplexed.

"Just come on down when you're ready. We'll be waiting." With that the redhead ducked out and disappeared down the hallway.

Kate looked back in the mirror and shook her head. With no idea what she was walking in to, she descended the stairs. Seeing Alexis in the entryway chatting amiably with a well-dressed man carrying a large black bag.

Alexis introduced them. "Kate this is Jean Claude. Jean Claude this is Kate."

"It's nice to meet you." Kate shook the man's hand looking from Jean Claude to Alexis, still trying to figure out what this was about. Then she noticed Jean Claude was looking at her intently but not at her bruises. He was looking at, no, more like _inspecting_ her hair.

"Jean Claude is a hair stylist at my salon. His specialty is color correction." Alexis looked down at the floor and then cautiously back up at Kate. "I knew you didn't feel like going out just yet so I figured Jean Claude could come to you." Eyebrows raised, Alexis hoped she hadn't overstepped.

Kate didn't know what to say. The Castle family seemed to have that effect on her. "You didn't have to go to all that trouble."

Jean Claude answered in a light French accent. "Ah, no trouble. Let us get a better look at this color." He guided Kate over to the natural light of the windows. "How was this done?"

As Kate described the cheap box hair coloring that she'd used, she watched the man visibly wince. The photos Alexis had given him were now scattered about as he studied Kate's original color. In a few short minutes he was mixing up his magic concoction on the kitchen counter. Kate perched on a bar stool, smock draped over her clothes, was ready to be transformed.

A little over an hour and one quick shower later, Kate looked and felt more normal than she had in days.

"It is acceptable?" He asked packing his things.

"Acceptable? I love it. Thank you." She grabbed for her purse to pay for his services but Jean Claude shook his head.

"That has already been taken care of." He picked up his bag and offered his hand. "It was lovely to meet you and Miss Alexis, tell your grandmother I said Hello."

As Jean Claude left, Kate smiled warmly. "Thank you Alexis, you really didn't have to go through all of that trouble. Please let me pay you back."

"Oh, Dad took care of the bill." Alexis shrugged. "I just know how much I hate it when I have a bad hair day. I can't imagine having the wrong color." She mock shuddered as she headed for the stairs. "By the way, I think Dad is hiding in his study."

He hadn't shown his face the entire time. Kate knocked lightly on the door.

"Come in." Castle held his breath as she entered, unsure what her reaction would be. Was it too much? Would she see it as interfering or as the caring gesture he meant it to be? His tension drained away when he saw her face. Better than the hair was her smile and the way her eyes were beaming.

"Thank you." She said simply as she walked towards him. "You didn't have to do this." She could only imagine how much a house call for corrective coloring must cost.

"It was no problem." He stood up, relieved and wrapped his arms around her. "Besides, it was Alexis' idea." His incredible daughter never ceased to amaze him. "Anyway, I was starting to feel like I was cheating, kissing a blonde."

She smacked his chest lightly and kissed him, allowing herself to melt into his embrace.

Lanie's voice shook her back to the present. "So, how are things going at Casa Castle?"

"Good. It's going good." Kate's voice trailed off in thought.

"But?" Lanie looked at her quizzically.

"What? No. Castle has been wonderful. It's been really nice staying at his place. It's just…" Kate sighed looking down at her fingers. "He asked me to move in with him."

Lanie's eyebrows shot upward. "Girl, you've been holding out on me. So, what's the problem?"

"I…I'm not sure I'm ready for that." Kate's voice sounded small, quiet.

"OK. Have you told him that?" Lanie was watching her friend closely.

"No. He told me to think about it." Nibbling at her lower lip she continued. "When I'm at the loft with Castle and Alexis, everything feels so warm. I can't believe the place I once called the bat cave feels so homey." Rolling her eyes as she half smiled.

"But you still aren't ready." It was more a statement than a question.

Kate let out a sigh, shaking her head. "It's all moved so fast, Lanie. He's Castle. He can still make me crazy. Now there are times he hovers and I want to strangle him. But then…am I pathetic to say that sometimes I like the way he takes care of things, of me?"

"Pathetic? Honey, God no. If anyone deserves a little TLC it's definitely you Kate, especially with everything you've been through. If Writer Boy's the one who can do that then I like him that much more." Lanie grabbed her friend's hand across the table and gave it a light squeeze. "Kate, you need to tell him how you feel. I think he'll understand."

As the waiter refilled their water glasses Kate made a conscious effort to change the subject. "So how is work? I need to know what the real world is like outside of the bat cave."

….

….

Castle came down the stairs of his loft and stopped short at his unexpected guest. "Mother, I didn't know you were here."

"I just dropped by to see how everyone was doing. How is Kate? Is she here?" Martha asked pouring herself a glass of wine.

"No, Kate's out having lunch with Lanie. She's doing OK." The grimace on his face spoke volumes. "She's …better." Searching for the right word.

"Then what's wrong?" Martha offered him a glass but he shook his head.

"Nothing, really. I mean, her injuries are healing, although some of those bruises are going to take a long time to go away." His mouth was pressed into a tight line before he continued, his voice low. "She's still having nightmares; wakes up, yelling. Sometimes she pushes me away like…" He swallowed hard, not continuing his thought.

Martha finished it for him. "Like you're the man who attacked her."

"Yeah." Castle sat down on the stool next to her. "I want to make it better. I just…I don't know how."

"Kate's a tough girl. She'll come through this. Just give her time." She placed a consoling hand on her son's arm. "I hear you asked her to move in?"

Castle shot her a surprised look that she dismissed with a wave of her hand. "Alexis told me. Are you sure you weren't jumping the gun a bit?"

Castle's voice went up in pitch. "I like having her here and so does Alexis. Besides, she shouldn't be alone." His brow creased as he looked back down at the countertop.

Martha opted for a different tactic. "How are you doing with all of this?"

"What? I'm fine. No one attacked _me_ and locked me in a cellar." Sarcasm seeped into the words.

Martha dipped her head a bit, looking up at him. "I know but that doesn't mean all of this doesn't effect you too, Darling. What kind of dreams are you having?"

He looked at her almost guiltily. "We go into that cellar and we're too late. She's lying there and…" He paused, closing his eyes, his breathing becoming shallow.

"Richard," she said softly, gently squeezing his arm. "Just don't kid yourself that this hasn't affected you too. Maybe its not so much that Kate shouldn't be alone as much as you not wanting her to leave."

The click of the front door startled them both as Kate entered the loft. "Well, speak of the devil." Martha called out as she walked towards Kate, pulling her into a quick hug. "How are you doing, Kiddo?"

"I'm fine Martha. It's good to see you." Kate's smile was genuine.

Rick forced his tone to sound lighter than he felt. "How was lunch with Lanie?"

"It was good. Lanie's busy with work. Something I should be getting back to."

"Isn't it a little soon?" Rick's brow furrowed in concern.

"I've got my follow up appointments on Friday. If all goes well I could be back at work Monday morning." Kate looked up at Rick, her brows drawn together surprised by his expression.

Rick opened his mouth to speak but wasn't sure how to respond. Martha stepped in, taking Kate by the elbow and leading her towards the kitchen. "Let me get you a glass of wine, my dear. Your hair looks lovely by the way. I hear you met Jean Claude."

As the two women wandered into the other room Castle ran his hand through his hair. His stomach tightening for reasons he was still trying to understand.

….

….

Her head on Rick's chest, Kate had fallen asleep. All week, he'd routinely lay out one of his dress shirts for her to sleep in and they'd crawl into bed. The new ritual providing them both some level of comfort.

During the night Kate rolled away, kicking off the covers. She drifted awake, feeling a soft caress against her neck. Slowly opening her eyes, she didn't move. Rick's hand trailed from her neck, down her arm to her wrist. His thumb tracing soft circles over the purplish ring that still shown there.

So intent on her bruises he hadn't realized she was awake. Kate was unable to read his expression. His jaw was tight, his mouth a thin line. His hand continued it's downward path as his fingers lightly brushed over the discoloration on her thigh just under the hem of the dress shirt. She shuddered slightly.

Startled, Rick looked up to find her watching him closely. Kate was taken aback by the look in his eyes; guilt, fear, and concern all warred for dominance across his face. Without thinking she slowly trailed her fingers across his cheek, brushing her thumb against the stubble on his chin. He opened his mouth, searching for words to explain. She didn't give him the chance. Her hand slipped to the back of his neck as she pulled his mouth to hers. The long slow kiss that followed left him dumbfounded, his heart beating wildly.

His hand grasped her shoulder, unsure whether to pull her closer or push her away before he couldn't stop. He hadn't done more than hold her since she'd been back. As Kate's mouth released his, he breathed deeply trying to maintain his control.

Kate's eyes never left his and the emotion she saw there overwhelmed her. Her heart pounded in her ears. Her fingers played in his hair, keeping him close. As their breaths mingled in the silence of the night she whispered, "Make love to me, Rick."

He cupped her cheek, holding her still as he focused on her eyes. He needed to be sure. Her gaze never wavered. Before he could form a question her mouth was on his again. Kate kissed him with an urgency that caused his body to respond. Rick's hand caressed her back, her hips, slowly trailing her contours. Relishing the feel of her curves as they molded against him. When the kiss broke he forced himself to slow down, pressing feather light kisses over bruised skin. They spent the next hour reaffirming through touch as much as words that she was still very much alive.

Afterwards they lay wrapped around one another, enjoying the closeness. Rick's hand lay across her waist and her fingers played lightly over his. She chuckled quietly.

"What?" He asked kissing her temple.

"When I was in the club and the first wave of dizziness hit me I didn't know it was the drugs. I remember thinking that without you around I hadn't had a decent cup of coffee all day. When did that happen? When did I stop managing my own caffeine fix?" She turned up to look at him. A half smile played across her lips but he didn't return it.

"Can you tell me what happened?" He held his breath awaiting her response.

She rolled onto her back, staring up at the ceiling. "Sometimes I think the worst part is the things I can't remember. The gaps I'll never be able to fill." Her voice was surprisingly steady as she spoke. "I remember Viktor dragging me into that van. I know what he tried to do." Rick's hand tightened on hers. She squeezed back, accepting the comfort. "One minute I can picture him on top of me and the next there's… nothing." Rick closed his eyes, lightly kissing the top of her head. Taking in her scent. Reminding himself that he was holding her in his arms, safe. "My therapist says that some of my nightmares are just my mind trying to fill in the blanks." She paused taking a breath, then another. "Then there are the ones in that basement." Her voice became quiet. "He was going to kill me."

He felt her tremble and he pulled her closer, feeling guilty for asking. "I'm sorry, Kate. I'm sorry."

"I'm alright." She intertwined her fingers with his. Taking a shaky breath she turned towards him. "How about you? When did you find out I was missing?"

Castle closed his eyes and pressed his lips together before speaking. "I waited all night for you to call. I went to the precinct the next morning to find out what was going on. No one knew anything. Then Montgomery told us you were missing." He took a deep breath to steady himself, the scenes playing out in his mind's eye. "I think it was the longest day of my life. At one point they found a woman's body and we thought it…we didn't know if…" His breath caught in his throat. He simply couldn't form the words.

"I'm OK, Rick. It's over. I'm right here." Kate took his face in her hands and kissed him softly.

"I know. I know." He repeated holding her tighter. Placing gentle kisses on her forehead, nose, lips. They lay facing each other, foreheads touching. Each finding calm in the others presence until exhaustion finally took over and they slept.

The next morning Rick awoke to find Kate watching him.

"See, it's creepy." She smiled at his slightly shocked look. He gave her a lazy grin and pulled her too him.

Giving him a quick kiss before pulling back, she looked him in the eye. "Rick, it's time for me to move back to my place." She found herself holding her breath as his content expression turn to a disappointed frown.

Kate placed her hand on his chest, looking down at her fingers. "I'm not even sure how to say what it means to me that you asked me to move in here. There's a part of me that wants to but I just don't think it's the right time."

He put his finger to her chin, lifting it back up until she looked at him. "We seem to be doing pretty well so far?"

"Yes, and I've loved every minute that I've been here. You and Alexis have been wonderful but I'm not ready for this." She nibbled her bottom lip nervously. "I don't think _we_ are ready for this. Not yet."

Hurt and confused, Rick pulled back, looking away. She tried to explain, taking hold of his hand, tugging him towards her. "Before all of _this_" she shook her head unable to find an appropriate term, "happened, you and I were just getting started." He went to interrupt but she cut him off. "We've known each other for almost two years but as a couple, we really haven't been dating all that long." She paused, waiting for him to acknowledge the truth in the statement.

He nodded, not sure how to respond but starting to see where she was going with this.

She continued. "With everything that's happened, it feels like somebody hit the fast forward button on our relationship. I just think we need to slow things back down. I don't want to make a major decision about _us_ because of what's happened, because of what someone else did. That doesn't feel right. I don't want to miss anything." She trailed the backs of her fingers across his chest, looking back up into his eyes. "I want to enjoy how we get there, not look back and think…"

"That we moved too fast and maybe for the wrong reasons?" He said slowly, finishing it for her. His shoulders slumped a bit and he swallowed hard as he pulled her closer.

"Yeah."

He brushed a stray strand of hair behind her ear as he sighed. "So, can I at least take this as a _maybe later_ instead of a _no_?"

"Definitely." Her smile widened as she reached up and kissed him.

"Well, then" he murmured pulling her to him, deepening the kiss. "I may have to let you leave my apartment eventually but I plan on keeping you in my bed as long as possible."

She tilted her head back, playfully giggling in response to his mischievous grin. The two enjoyed the rest of the morning not leaving his room.

….

….

Kate caught up on case files early Monday morning. If felt good to be back. The bullpen quiet, her mind wandered to thoughts of the weekend.

Rick practically begged her to stay until Sunday but she explained she needed some adjustment time and had things to do at her own place. He was disappointed but acquiesced somewhat gracefully. Rick offered to have groceries delivered to her apartment when she moved home Saturday. He knew the edible options in her fridge would be even less than usual.

Kate had to laugh at that. "Thank you but no. I can do my own grocery shopping and it will help things feel more normal."

"Really? Because from the look of your fridge I wouldn't equate grocery shopping and normal in the same sentence." Castle enjoyed the eye roll and the light slap on the arm he got in response.

Ryan and Esposito's entrance shook her from her thoughts. "Beckett, I didn't think you'd be back so soon." Ryan smiled as he headed towards her desk.

"Yeah, I thought Castle would've whisked you off to some tropical island to recuperate," Esposito said with a wicked grin.

And there it was. Her relationship with Castle was now out in the open. It took her only a moment to realize she was OK with that but rolled her eyes anyway. "Don't give him any ideas." Then she quickly changed the subject. "Catch me up. What cases are you boys working on?" And they dove back in as though she'd never left.

A couple of hours later a shadow fell across her desk. The aroma of a properly brewed latte all the clue she'd needed as to its owner.

Castle hovered next to her desk, two steaming cups in his hands. "Detective?" Trying to mask the nervousness in his eyes with a smile.

Kate smiled back. "Thank you." She reached for her coffee and gestured towards his chair. "You didn't have to come in today. Montgomery put me on desk duty and I've got plenty of paperwork to catch up on."

Castle settled in his chair and fought back a grin. He knew she'd want to jump back in but having her take it slow made him feel better. "Well, we can't have my favorite detective running low on caffeine."

She closed her eyes taking in the aroma and then a long slow sip. "Hmm. No, we certainly don't want that." She went over the current cases with him and let him look through some files. After a few hours with little to do, Castle resorted to his favorite pastime, watching her.

"Castle!" Kate barked, obviously annoyed.

"I know, I know. It's creepy." He said in mock surrender, slumping into his chair.

She almost smiled at his tone. "Look, you're bored. There's nothing going on here. Don't you have some writing or something to do?"

He sighed. There was certainly work of his own he could be doing but he wanted to be with her, make sure she was OK. Then his eyes lit up as an idea struck. "Hey, Alexis is going to be out late with a study group tonight and I believe I owe you a dinner at my place."

Kate's brow furrowed. "Castle, there's been lots of dinners at your place recently."

He leaned forward. "Yes, but why don't we rewind to the one we were suppose to have, but missed." His voice was low. "I know it won't be quite the same but…"

"I'd like that." She pursed her lips, her eyes dropping to his. She hadn't been alone with him in two nights and Kate had to admit that she missed him.

Castle left her to her paperwork and went home to prepare their meal.

When she arrived at his loft around six o'clock she found the lights were dim, the music low, and there were candles lit. The aroma of his homemade chicken cacciatore wafted through the apartment. Kate sighed contentedly as she took in the scene, shaking her head at him. "You didn't have to do all of this."

Rick wrapped his arms around her and pulled her into a slow dance in the living room. "No, I didn't have to but I wanted to." He kissed her softly before continuing. "I want to make sure that you know something, Kate."

She wrapped her hands around his neck as they swayed back and forth to the music. Looking up at him curiously, a small smile playing on her lips.

"I don't want to miss a moment of this either." His fingers drawing circles on her lower back, he looked directly into her eyes. "You should know that when you're ready, you just need to hurry home."

The kiss that followed sent a warmth flooding her entire body. Kate had to admit she might be ready to call this home sooner than she thought.

The End

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_**Writing this story has been an amazing ride. I never thought I could pull it off. I look forward to hearing what you think. Thank you for reading. - corlando**_


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